dungeon of hell codes

ISSUE NO. 1

MAGICAL MAGPIE'S
Rambles and Shambles.
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Monday, 25th August, 2025.

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RENOUNCING TERROR WITHIN THE WALLS.

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──────────────────── FIRST YEAR TERROR. Dearest readers, with dire times approaching the school as the season swiftly transitions into a delightful spring, we present to you the newest and latest gossip article; outlining the wonders within our walls. Slytherin’s lone wolf, Oliver Armani, who spends his days resorting to physical altercations, with Gryffindor’s Sandy Thompson, which tarnish the reputable house of Armani, finds himself developing rather foul language, as though seeking some solace with the venom he spews to shield his unfavourable appearance. Though his vermin was able to seep into other reputable houses, speculation of a heated debacle in the courtyard with a few fiery lions; most notably a select few who oddly disappear from the commons once a new moon arises. Yet, the far less favourable houses, notably Ravenclaw, oppose the only spark within their home; Novalie Moon, who attempted to set the commons ablaze. Although the delinquent redhead’s attempt proved fruitless, we hear that her love endeavours with Eric Kim transcend more sparks than imaginable. Though, the young raven's attempts to liven up the dull house miraculously failed, we have hopes that the young Weasley prodigy will seek success elsewhere, notably within Zonko's Joke Shop.

Notably, the Hufflepuff house pertains scammers, one lacking in height makes it up with his ego, illegally selling fraudulent potions, forcing most students to succumb to illness of the mind; most notably, Cirrus Nam, seen roaming the corridors as though in a haze, longing for more. ──────────────────── HORROR RETREAT. Following the futile Beauxbaton’s love retreat, we hear tales of the noble house of Slytherin engaging in such mischief that whispers circulate the very corridors that you, dear reader, walk in. Tales of a Night of Guys, engaging in far less respectable activities, prompted mere imitation events to arise following the trip, the season of love truly infecting us all. Though, despite mere first years having no true understanding of love, we hear the lovely Haven Bohannon sought love at first sight during the retreat, entwined by an adoration for ducklings with a mysterious unnamed figure. Yet, despite the horrid encounters found within the Welcoming Tea Party hosted by the rival school, such as allergy attacks, we hear Meiyu Xiang suffered from heartbreak a day leading up to Valentine’s, littering stale macaroons after being rejected by yet another mysterious man following her allegations of stalking within the castle; reaffirming the belief that perhaps the adoration for love sought by first years, would truly be reserved for later.