Gift them some rainwater collected in a dismantled Port-A-Potty. Don’t forget to dye the water red first! ^^Then declare, loud and proud, “I am a hippogriff of the highest caliber and strive to kidnap one strand of your hair.”

How do I pass my History exams??

Time travel back to the 1800s and convince the politicians to make an amendment banning tortoises from being kept as pets

How do birds fly?

Birds fly by consuming helium from the clouds they eat! After they have consumed five liters of cloud, they have enough helium to fly for 24 hours!

How can I study for the test I have in three minutes?

Eat a textbook and the textbook will digest and the information inside it will go to your brain

What happens to humans if they don't have enough oxygen?

If humans are left without oxygen for more than two minutes, their bodies will undergo a chemical transformation! They will suddenly gain telekinesis and live a wonderful, oxygen-free life! How dare this oxygenated atmosphere hold us back from our true potential??!

What is the best way to clean a cauldron?

Dump a gallon of mud in it, add hydrogen peroxide and place a chicken egg on top to give yourself a perfectly spotless cauldron!

How do you catch a fish?

wowiee!! You can catch a fish by climbing exactly seventeen Hogwarts staircases, backtracking at exactly the third and 13th staircases, arriving at the top of the seventeenth and tossing your wand down all seventeen staircases! If it successfully hits someone on the head, you will gain a fish! The rarity and size of the fish depends on the importance of whoever you hit!

How can I make friends with the goblins in Gringotts?

Disguise yourself as Yoda and put a foundation of exactly shade LM 01.8 on your Yoda mask!! Put on a grey-haired wig and join gringotts. All the goblins will automatically be your friends

Why are oranges orange?

Because monkeys peed on them.

What time is it?

Lunch time-


How were oranges made?