ACTUAL SOLO AND JOB SOLO COMBINED
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Bar Harbor. He had moved to Bar Harbor, not because of him seeking new jobs, but because he was looking to sell candy and sweets. Hell, his wife made food, and since they moved to Bar Harbor, they were practically living in a postcard picture perfect town and every ice cream shop in the near proximity sold lobster ice cream amongst other consumables. It seemed to be some sort of specialty, just like them selling all of their prized and trademarked Maine Blueberry products. They had soda beverages that were blueberry flavored!

Well, Elmo was going to take advantage of that, especially if they were charging almost ten united states dollars for the lobster flavored products. He couldn't say that he could take advantage of the cost for the blueberry products though.

He had a picnic basket, wicker and sleek, placed on the kitchen counter and he let his wife load up the basket with her sweets that she had managed to obtain the recipes for. She got them from a cookbook that specialized in lobster products in Maine, and he figured it would get them some money. It might be the same concept of what? giving people in the south sweet tea and fried food? They'll love it, even if that's what they had already in the area.

Elmo debated putting in bags of wizarding sweets, yet he held back, not because he would not laugh at their surprise or horror, but because of the statute of secrecy and the fact that he would not like to land his butt in jail just for ripping people off.

His plan, or rather, his logic, for selling the sweets were basically in the concept of 'if muggles like overpriced novelty food, then they'll love my wife's novelty food.' That logic in mind, he planned on selling his wife's treats. Who knows, if this went well, he could probably make a Break Family Co. shop.

He looked at his wife with a hint of romance in his face, swooped in behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed the side of her face before letting go. The faux-muppet took a few glass bottles of blueberry soda that he had personally removed the label off of and replaced with his own, with the label announcing the 'family' brand, 'Break Family Co. Maine Blueberry Soda'.

No, he did not make his own soda, he just slapped a new label on it.

"I love you Debs."
"I love you too. How long do you think you're going to be out today?"
"Just a few hours, I hope. I'm going up to the cabins in the woods just outside of town and alongside the outskirts of town. What did you give me to sell today?"

Debbie pointed at the lobster side of the picnic basket, three different compartments within that compartment sorting the desserts, baked goods and snacks. "For lobster desserts, there is lobster ice cream, lobster fudge and lobster shortbread cookies. In this section, the baked good section, there are lobster biscuits, lobster hand pies, and mini lobster rolls. Then for a snack, lobster pretzel bites." She moved her fingers to the other half of the picnic basket, also divided up as a way of organization.

"You can put your knockoff drinks in this compartment. This compartment over here, also split into sections, you have blueberry muffins, blueberry cobbler cups, blueberry barbeque sauce and blueberry butter spread. Please sell these, do whatever you can, but if you don't, I will be happy to see you home again tonight."

Elmo gave her a quick kiss then grabbed the basket, walking outside before he turned back inside to grab himself a bottle of jack. Just to save for when he needed it. If he did. He might not.

He turned his tail back around and hopped onto his motorcycle, starting it up and getting on the road. With several loud vrooms, he managed made it to the outskirts of town, which took only mere minutes.

Elmo drove up to the first parking spot he saw outside of the house and took notice of the meter that stood on the sidewalk. He took a closer look and saw a coin slot. Maybe it took galleons? He pulled out a leprechaun galleon and put it into the coin slot, seeing that he now had time to start going door to door and hopefully not come back to a ticket.

He smelled pine from the trees that decorated the first house's yard and the dirt pathway that he was starting his trek on. He could smell compost, and it smelled like.. well.. crap. Hopefully once he got to the doorway to the house, the smell would go away. He took a few steps up the stairs and knocked on the door sharply.

A rat-a-tat several times, and a door opened up. A man standing there in his bathrobe opened the door. "I'm not coming back later. This is your first and last chance to buy some EXCLUSIVE Maine consumables. Sir, would you like to have some breakfast? My wife handmade the Lobster Biscuits, cheddar-bay style! Or maybe, are you more interested in blueberries? She made some blueberry muffins with a blueberry butter spread!" The man was obviously fresh out of bed and didn't really want visitors.

"Are you a tourist? I'll cut you a deal, twenty five percent off of everything in this basket." Elmo quizzed and then gave a soft smile, a little telling that he knew that the man had some sort of hope of getting rid of him, and Elmo was not leaving until he got money.

He closed the door, and Elmo remained to listen to the footsteps on the creaking floors of the house growing slightly fader then growing again after a brief pause. The man returned to the door holding his wallet. "Do you have something more.. exotic or unique?" The man asked. "Blueberry Barbeque Sauce. It's 25 dollars normally, but with a 25 percent discount, you'll be paying 18.75" What a rip off! But the man still paid.

Elmo handed him a medium sized jar full of the barbeque he ordered and thanked him for his purchase and for supporting the residents of Maine. As he walked away and the door shut behind him, he muttered under his breath. 'What a sucker.'

He walked up to his motorcycle and saw two people walking down the sidewalk. "Hey guys! I got something for you! Authentic, genuine and homemade lobster and blueberry products!" The pair only locked hands and looked away from him as if like trying to avoid the people selling stuff in the middle of the mall in their little kiosks.

Elmo was not going to have that. He walked behind them as if stalking them, yet still carrying the picnic basket, and kept talking. "My wife made some wonderful stuff. You might like them, they're really good. And, like I said, they're the real deal! The blueberries are grown here in Maine while the lobsters were caught right here in Bar Harbor! These are some fresh products!" The lady holding onto the guy's hand stopped while he wanted to keep walking.

Elmo only stopped because the lady stopped. She turned around and the guy finally stopped as well. "If we buy something, will you go away?" She, with annoyance in her tone, asked.

"Sure, whatever."

"What's for sale? What's the cheapest item?" She added, almost like a command for 'let's get this over with.'

Geeze, maybe people weren't necessarily that nice face to face. But then again, Elmo did just follow them down the sidewalk trying to get them to spend their money on his overpriced foods.

"Have my wife's best-ever MAINE BLUEBERRY BUTTER SPREAD! Question, do you live here or are you tourists?" Elmo repeated the question, slightly reworded from earlier. "We live here." The man standing behind the lady replied, a tone of faux kindness in his reply.

"Great, then you get twenty five percent off of all orders in this basket! The blueberry products start at twelve dollars, which make your starting price nine dollars. The cheapest item with the blueberries is the butter spread! I promise, it is the best butter that you will have ever tasted, and it is healthy and organic." The lady turned towards her husband and whispered. "Let's just get this and.. he'll go away." If they didn't have plans on buying things today! They shouldn't have came out!

Elmo was handed the money, and in return, he gave the lady and the guy two jars of blueberry butter.

The sun was now pressing against his neck and he had hoped that since it was spring, hopefully it wasn't going to be blistering hot. He was north enough for it to be cold, right?

Well, maybe it's all just an illusion, maybe his skin is being manipulated by the sunrays.

He saw other people walking around, and then after taking a few more steps forward, he saw a playground full of parents. Jackpot! He had hit the gold mine!

The creepiest part of it wasn't the fact that he was just a childless man going into the park, it was the fact that he was almost cosplaying as a pirate with a hooked hand and an eyepatch over his eye.

Nay, maybe it was the fact that he was childless. But whatever! Money was his child. He walked back to his motorcycle and opened up the saddlebag that was a part of his seat and pulled out the bottle of jack that he had grabbed earlier.

He had worked around kids! He knew that they were all selfish jerks that didn't think about anyone other than themselves! He took a swig just with the intent of and for courage.

He put the bottle back into the saddlebag and fastened the picnic basket to the back of his motorcycle with several straps with the hope it keeps the basket on the motorcycle, and despite the fact that he was only going a less than a quarter mile up the road, he was still just moving his motorcycle forward just so that he didn't need to walk back the same length after getting all that potential money.

He parked in a parking spot and repeated the process that he did earlier, spying a meter and taking that spot rather than taking the parking lot that was closer that required one to use a muggle device and download an app and put in the parking lot number and the vehicle's license plate.

Oh well. It wasn't like he was going to keep that galleon forever. It was fake after all!

He undid all the straps and grabbed the basket with his hooked hand and with his free hand, he extended curtesy to each of the moms and dads that were there. "Afternoon! Fancy a taste of Maine's finest lobster fudge?" The mom that spoke up said, "Oh.. uh.. no thank you." Oh to put on a dumb polite tone and to be rejected. Well, Elmo wasn't going to have that.

"You sure? It's better than whatever you have in that thermos." He replied back a little sharply. The mom flustered and pulled out twenty bucks. "Here, give me whatever I can buy with that." Elmo handed her two lobster fudges and the knockoff blueberry soda.

The mom took a sip of the blueberry soda and had a look on her face that almost told him that she knew. Before she could say anything, Elmo scampered off to move onto the next cluster of parents.

"Look, just buy something, I'll give you the deal I never gave anyone else. It'll be a secret deal. Twenty five percent off of everything in this basket. Anything you want, it'll be discounted!" A dad pulled out his money and bought blueberry muffins, "For the kids." Uhuh. Sure. Whatever. Money! It was money! That's all it was to him.

A mom who was listening to the discounted sale pitch only seemed to offer some money just because she couldn't say no, nor could she walk away without feeling guilty. If that was the case, then Elmo needed people to be more like that. "Here, some Blueberry Butter Spread!"

A kid walked up behind him and tapped on his back. Elmo turned around and the boy asked if he was a pirate. "Only on weekends, lil one." Elmo replied smoothly, and the boy cracked another question. "Do pirates eat lobster cookies?"

Now, could he do something to get more money? What did these stores do sometimes? Oh right, samples! "Aye. And they share them with brave lads." He pulls out a lobster shortbread cookie and hands it to the little boy. The kid takes a bite anxiously then his face lit up as if he tasted the best cookie ever. Or maybe it was the fact that it was sweet. Whatever it was, he had parents coming to him from left and right and it didn't seem like they had a look of anger on their faces.

After several minutes of talking to each of them and taking their money, he realized the parents felt obligated to buy something and Elmo had only pocketed the money and felt very smug, perhaps more smug than anything. Why? Because there were no food left in the basket, meaning that he had sold everything!

He walked back to his motorcycle and took off to go back home to his wife.

That was when he heard a rattling. He slowed down at the traffic light turning red and stopped the motorcycle to quickly check the saddlebag and saw, besides his bottle of jack, a bottle of unopened blueberry lemonade, something his wife made for him to drink, but he was not drinking it if he still had an opportunity to prosper. He decided he would give this one last shot, and pulled over to the side of the road where a house had rested. He walked up to the doorway and knocked. A man, unkept and wearing a white tanktop with boxers, opened the door for a brief second, allowing Elmo to talk.

"Afternoon! Care to-" And the door slammed. He growled. "YOU [BLEEP BLEEP BLEEEEEEP]! You just had to buy something! I didn't even plan on selling this, yet it's a favorite! Just buy it for gods sake!" A lady opened the door again, apparently his wife, and apologized for his rudeness. "Look, if you'll stop cussing, I'll buy whatever you're selling." Elmo nodded, and handed her the blueberry lemonade and in return got five bucks.

Well, that was everything. He thanked her and returned to his motorcycle, now going home for sure. When he would get home, he walked in with the cash in his picnic basket putting on a mock face of sadness, a facade. Debbie saw his look and then felt a bit sad, thinking no one bought her food that she spent quite a bit of time making herself.

Maybe they don't like out-of-towner food. Maybe she didn't make authentic Maine food. When Elmo asked her to put the stuff in the fridge, she walked towards the picnic basket and opened it up to see a whole lot of dollars piled into the container as if like a bath of green paper.

Her eyes went wide. "Elmo! YOU SOLD IT ALL?"

"Yes ma'am! Anything for you! You make the best meals anyone could ask for, I'm going to do this again next week, do you want to keep making stuff? Maybe we'll have a family business by the end of this year." Elmo responded, partially complimenting her and partially making a promise seem like a dream come true, even if he had no guarantees.

Elmo went into his room, not to find new clothes and to take a shower, but to see a picture of Octavius, Clark, even his new husband and the rest of the kids. He sighed. He loved Debbie but part of him really wanted to adopt some kids, or maybe to try for some kids with Debbie.

The easiest way seemed to be adoption but that was a discussion he didn't want to have. Not now anyways, not since Debbie was now in a good mood with the loot he brought home.

Elmo spent the next thirty minutes in the shower and came back out to put on his khaki shorts with a button up short sleeved shirt that seemed very summer-break at a beach.

He came back out of the bedroom to the smell of Debbie's wonderful cooking. He walked into the kitchen to the warm and cozy lighting from the overhead lamp, while steam rose from the pots on the stove with the smell of lobster and butter in the air. He listened to his wife hum a little softly as she plated the food and Elmo leaned against the wall in the kitchen, his expression a little softer.

Debbie didn't turn away from plating the table to look at him, but she spoke regardless. "You smell like the outdoors. I mean I know why but why do you also smell like whiskey?" Elmo responded. "Aye. Well, the outdoors was loud today. A bit overstimulating, I guess."

He watched Debbie step aside so that he could see the table. Donned on the table was a large dish of lobster mac and cheese that was beautifully golden, with a bowl of blueberry vinaigrette salad that was topped with goat cheese and pecans. In a basket lined with a paper towel, there was fresh bread with a ramekin of blueberry butter. Further, clean glasses with the imprints of lobsters decorating the glass as a pitcher of blueberry lemonade stood off to the side but still in between Debbie and Elmo's seats.

He looked on the counter, and a blueberry pie was cooling. The crust seemed to be latticed perfectly, and to think that maybe Debbie and Elmo were doing okay in the muggle-ish life. As far as he was aware neither him or her used magic to do anything today.

"Sit, you worked hard today." Debbie called. Elmo followed up after taking a seat, and after his wife took a seat as well. "Well, I couldn't have done it without your food. They loved it. They fought over it, I'm sure they could've bought your shoes if I offered it to them! You're the best cook I know, and look, it got us a lot of money."

Debbie wasn't sure what to say, but he knew by the look on her face that she felt good, but also not sure how to react. It was kind of him to say that, but honestly, other than a bit of manipulation and force, he didn't play a role in selling anything! His wife's food practically sold itself!

They picked up their silverware and began eating. And the last thing Elmo said regarding food (or at least the last thing his author will allow for this solo) was, "Debs, this really is better than anything I sold today."

"Good. Because I made it for you."