Finished Scars That Remain pv Raizel

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❂《 ⌜ November 16, 2024 ▎ Sometime ⌟

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As she expected, it was another sleepless night. From thoughts about the incident of Hogsmeade to what had transpired last night between her cousin. To make it worse, Meyra… didn't come back that night. It intrigued her and at the same time, it worried her so much. It made her toss and turn in her sleep, trying to figure out why. It can't just be her being rebellious and wanting to stay up until curfew or maybe that fight was just too much? Raizel wanted to scream into her pillow just thinking about that. Come to think of it, there were other times as well that this happened and she always comes back the next morning. Why? Raizel ruffled her hair, letting out a silent annoyed groan.

Meet me in the hospital wing tomorrow…

If you haven't figured out yourself.

Meyra's last words bothers her more than they should have. What does she want to say to her? Raizel rolled onto her back, staring blankly at the space above, trying to think on what she should be figuring out by now but nothing was coming into her mind. Slowly, She’s not gonna get answers this way and it was about time for her to go as well. With a destination in mind, the Gryffindor set off for the Hospital Wing. She walked down the near empty halls, looking over a couple of people that she passes by who are already doing their own routine. Talk about early birds.

Raizel isn’t an early morning person during the weekends but she’s already wide awake so why bother lying in bed and she has other places to be, have a certain someone to meet. Subconsciously, her hand touched where she was been hit by her Step-cousin last night, remembering the pain it brought not just on her but also on Meyra, especially after leaving that scratch on her cheek. She looked so upset during that time and she found out why. When she tried to heal it on her own, erase it from existence if it’ll just upset her cousin, it never did. It remained there for some unknown reasons.

It raised more questions on why. Scratches that she receives from broom racing or any other activity gets healed completely by magic and potions. This one, however, didn’t. She sighed, shoving her hands into her pant’s pockets. Questions after questions but no answers to them yet.

I’ll explain everything then…

She paused, thinking back. Does this have to do anything about what Meyra told her? Perhaps. She wouldn’t say that if nothing was up. Raizel practically rushed towards the Hospital Wing and surprisingly enough, she didn’t get lost on her way. Once there, she stopped just before the door, wondering if she should enter or not. At least this time, she’s not here to be treated but then again, perhaps they might have answers on why that scratch remained. She’ll set those aside for now. She’s only here for one reason and that’s to meet Meyra. She pushed open the door, eyes quickly scanning for a familiar figure.

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⌜ Scars That Remain ⌟ | ⌜ WC: 515/200 ⌟
««««« Dialogue | #800000

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With another sigh, which seemed to be all she knew how to do lately, Meyra sat up in bed with her eyes still half-closed and her hair all disheveled and partly covering her face. Anyone who saw her like that would think the girl had had a fight with her pillow. Rubbing her face with her hands and tucking the messy strands of hair behind her ears, Meyra finally seemed to have gained enough courage to leave the comfort of her covers.

Looking out the window it was possible to see part of the Hogwarts grounds. The forest that stretched across the landscape, the lake that looked like a mirror reflecting the vegetation and the sky that had risen on a rare cheerful winter morning. It was a beautiful, soothing image that helped ease the weight that seemed to have decided to call her heart home.

Around her, she noticed that some beds were still occupied with other patients sleeping in them, some were already unmade, a sign that their occupants had already vacated them. There was some movement, with visitors arriving, patients who had already recovered from their illnesses leaving, some taking the opportunity to have their first morning chat before leaving the Hospital Wing as well.

Meyra decided that it was also a good time to start her day, despite the troubled night, her stomach was already growling slightly with hunger. She was about to place her bare feet on the floor when the door to the Hospital Wing opened once more. Her heart felt like it wanted to fly out of her chest when she saw who was the girl who was now preparing to enter. As soon as their eyes met, Meyra felt a cold run through her body, paralyzing her with a mixture of feelings between fear, guilt and shame.

She tried to analyze her cousin's face, trying to understand what her state of mind was. If the brown eyes that had sought her out and found her were looking at her with judgment, accusation, pity or any other feeling that would make her feel small, less, unworthy and truly cursed for her choices. Did Raizel already know what she was or was she there looking for answers?

Meyra remembered the promise she had made the night before, before leaving the dormitory they both shared, and she knew she couldn't break it, it was the least she could do. It was her responsibility to have to tell the whole truth to her friend, her cousin, who had made her feel at home since her first day at Hogwarts. The young girl suddenly remembered her father, Rodney always told her that she had to learn to be more responsible, that she had to learn to take care of her own things and to follow the rules. Well...it seems that this was how she would learn, by making mistakes that she could not erase and having to live with the consequences of that.

"Hey!" She said in a low, calm voice, giving Raizel a small smile, a smile that did not completely hide the agitation of her soul that could be seen through her green eyes, "You came early! Good morning." She greeted, "Are you okay?" She asked, her eyes scanning her cousin's figure. She looked exhausted to her, as if she hadn't had a good night's rest either, "I'm sorry Rai, I...." She began, but halfway through she had lost the strength of her words. A weight seemed to have suddenly fallen on top of her, causing her shoulders to slump forward, her head to lower, and her gaze to fall to the ground at her feet, "I hope you can forgive me. I...I don't know...there's no excuse for my behaviour. I'm sorry Rai..."

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❂《 ⌜ November 16, 2024 ▎ Sometime ⌟

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Empty beds, others were occupied but none of the occupants was the one she wanted to see. It does make her wonder why Meyra would pick the hospital wing as the place to meet up. Was she expecting to be hurt? Maybe getting attacked? But why? And by who if that is the case? Worry was present in those eyes of hers as she frantically searched for her cousin, marching into the room. Worry along with a bit of annoyance but that was mostly towards herself. If Meyra was being bullied and this was the result of it, then she won't forgive herself for not noticing it that quickly. Those feelings grew more when she finally found her, locking eyes with her.

She looked like a mess…

The first thought that came into her mind was violence and Raizel swore she would beat anyone who dares hurt her cousin but of course, she shouldn't jump to conclusions for there might be other reasons. Slowly, she made her way towards where Meyra is, trying her best to look so calm yet she knows some of that worry and annoyance was leaking through that mask of hers. A greeting, a smile and a question, those were Meyra's first actions when she saw her. As much as Raizel would want to return that greeting, that smile, she couldn't, not when the younger Gryffindor started apologizing to her for some reasons that she doesn't know.

Raizel stopped just before her cousin, listening to her before speaking. “Why are you apologizing?” She asked, her voice so low but not low enough for Meyra not to hear. Her eyes, there weren't any signs of fury or anything. Just genuine worry and relief perhaps to see that Meyra is alright. She was all she could think about last night since she didn't come back and since she asked to meet in the hospital wing, she had assumed the worst, even more so when she asked to meet at the hospital wing. “Aren't you the one in pain here?” She still doesn't know what she's going through, she won't force it out of her either. In fact, shouldn't she be the one apologizing to Meyra? For not knowing what she's going through and then making it worse like what she did yesterday. She should be the one apologizing for not being able to do anything at all.

“You don't have to explain everything. I know you promised… but you don't have to.” She doesn't want to force it out of her and she doesn't want to be so pushy like yesterday. “Just know that I’ll still be here for you even if you push me away.” It was the least she could do for her, the only thing that she could do.

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⌜ Scars That Remain ⌟ | ⌜ WC: 464/200 ⌟
««««« Dialogue | #800000

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Meyra let her cousin speak, partly because she wanted to know how she really felt, what thoughts made her come find her at the Hospital Wing, on the other hand it was a way of gaining more time to discern what to say, what words to use to tell to her friend that she shared a dorm with a monster, that despite being family, Meyra had hidden important information from her about who she really is, a secret she had kept for three months since they had exchanged their first conversation at the Great Hall. And by having kept all of this hidden, by having chosen to keep everything to herself, she had ended up putting her own cousin in danger, defenceless, not knowing the real possible consequences of that disagreement and the real reason why Meyra had retreated so far from her true self in those moments of self hatred.

With her cousin's last words, Meyra felt such a great feeling of gratitude spread in her chest that it seemed impossible to contain all its strength within herself. Raizel was such a great force of kindness and goodness that Meyra found herself overwhelmed by such a force. Instinctively, the young girl raised her hand with the intention of holding her friend's hand, but regretted the gesture halfway through, letting her hand fall to her lap instead, where she began fidgeting with the hospital gown she was wearing.

Meyra finally looked at Raizel, taking her eyes from the floor she had been staring at, and she saw the honest concern in her cousin's face. There was no accusation or any sort of judgement in her warm brown eyes. Meyra wanted to hide with shame, by feeling so unworthy of all her friend's gentleness. "No, I have to tell you Rai." She said in a weak voice, barely more than a whisper.

She closed her eyes tightly, preparing herself to say out loud what she knew she could no longer avoid, she could no longer pretend to be what she was not. But why did it all have to happen this way? Why does it have to be so difficult and painful? So unfair? It hadn't been her choice, hadn't been her fault. The night it all happened was the night her own life shattered into pieces and she still hasn't been able to fix it, deep down she knew, it would never be whole again as some parts of it would never come back, would never heal.

Taking a deep breath, Mey finally opened her eyes again and forced herself to look at Rai. She knew she had to say this as soon as possible or her courage would quickly fade again, she couldn't let herself cower under the weight of shame and guilt. "Rai, I..." She started, feeling the blood drain from her face, a sense o general cold spreading through her body as her heart beating was the only thing she could feel and hear, "I...I am," Her hands were sweating coldly and she felt a dizzy feeling envelop her. It was as if everything around her had become detached from reality and she was alone in her own frequency, an invisible threat bearing down on her and she was trapped, unable to run away or hide, "a werewolf." She said finally, in a voice that could hardly be heard. And as if all her strength had left her once more, she dropped her shoulders and guided her hands towards her face, covering her eyes as if that could provide a shield against the reality that was spinning violently towards her again, "You have every right to hate me, to not speak to me again. If...if you do that...I'll understand.", She told her cousin, her voice escaping between the palm of her hands.

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❂《 ⌜ November 16, 2024 ▎ Sometime ⌟

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I am… a werewolf…

Now that she thinks about it, Meyra had a reason to think she should've figured it out by now, especially after that fight. Pieces to this puzzle had been scattered for her since the beginning, since she had noticed the once in a month disappearance of her cousin during the evening and only returning in the morning. The exhaustion and agitation whenever that night approaches and after it and now, that scratch that she tried to beal but never disappeared. Three months should've been enough to grow her suspicion of her, of this secret that she had been hiding. But Raizel never did. Either she was completely oblivious to it despite all the pieces before that she could use to create the big picture or perhaps she just doesn't want to suspect her cousin of hiding things from her and besides, she has her own rights to hide it. She would never hold a grudge against her for it.

A hand slowly made its way towards her own cheek, to where that small scratch was as she looked down. It was no wonder even such a tiny thing would be deemed so significant by her. She understands now. A scratch or a bite from a werewolf, no matter what the form is, would always leave a scar even when healed. Would this then turn her into a werewolf? No, a werewolf in human form won't transmit the curse, a curse that they are forced to carry until the day they die so that's a relief at least. To be honest, her heart did skip a beat when Meyra revealed her secret. Her mind threatened to go into a state of panic at the thought of getting the curse but that was the consequences of her actions. What she wouldn't want is that her cousin would get into trouble for it, getting caught up to her reckless action. She was more worried about that.

You can't help me… No one can help me…

Those words made more sense… Lycanthropy is a disease with no cure. As much as it pains her to admit it but Meyra is right about that. She can't help her, no one can. Raizel lowered her head in the defeat, hand clenched so tight due to the frustration bubbling deep inside but eventually, it stopped. There was no point in getting worked up about something you can't control, something you can't change. What she should focus on now is… what else could she do. She might not be able to cure this disease that her cousin is forced to suffer from but that doesn't mean she couldn’t do something about the pain that came with it. Meyra’s self-hatred, her self-isolation, the way that she thinks she deserved to be hurt. All of those, she'll break it all.

Raizel had never been that good when it comes to comforting people but she tries, just like now. Meyra's hesitation earlier… she had taken notice of it and it pained her to see it when she knew she needed something to hold on to. If that was the case, then it is her job to take the first step in. “Mey…” she called out first before pulling the younger Gryffindor into a warm embrace. “I told you, even if you push me away, I’ll still be here.” She assured her with a gentle squeeze. “Why would you think that I would hate you? To never speak to you?” That's right, she may be a werewolf but what she sees here right now is a living being, her cousin, her family and someone that she knows that needs a friend to be there for her.

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⌜ Scars That Remain ⌟ | ⌜ WC: 618/200 ⌟
««««« Dialogue | #800000

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As soon as her last words had left her mouth, it was like time had stopped and now the seconds were returning at a very slow rhythm. The ticking of the clock hands was a stark contrast to how fast her heart was beating inside her chest. She wasn't even sure if she was breathing as she waited for what Raizel was going to tell her, how she would respond to such a revelation and everything that it implied in the relationship between the two of them. The fact that she kept her true nature hidden, the fact that that scar would never leave...

She still had her head down, looking at her cousin sideways with a look somewhat blurred by tears. Trying to predict the other girl's reaction to her words. She saw how Raizel seemed to have tensed up, clenching her hands into fists at her sides. Meyra closed her eyes, expecting the worst. She knew she deserved Raizel not wanting to have anything to do with her anymore, she knew she deserved to receive harsh words without consideration. And if Rai wanted to reciprocate physically... then she knew she deserved that too. So she simply waited, eyes closed, for whatever would come next, whatever it was, she was prepared to receive it.

She was prepared to receive anything. Anything but what actually came next. She first heard Raizel call her name, in a tone so soft that it made her open her eyes in surprise. When she felt her cousin pulling her closer and felt her arms hugging her, her surprise only increased and her green eyes widened in disbelief at what was happening. She didn't deserved that...“I told you, even if you push me away, I’ll still be here.” Raizel told her, and the grip around her heart just got stronger, squeezing it to the point it was painful. “Why would you think that I would hate you? To never speak to you?” her cousin asked, and she couldn't hold it in anymore.

Meyra replied to Raizel's hug, also wrapping her in her arms in a tight embrace. The tears she had be keeping buried inside her, she could no longer hold them back. They fell uncontrollably and she found herself crying into her cousin's shoulder. It came like a powerful wave, all those feelings that she had tried so hard to tame, were released, like a wild beast that had suddenly freed itself from the place where it had been confined.

"Because I did that to you..." the young girl said between sobs, "Because I had such shameful behaviour and...and you were just trying to help." Meyra said in a sad tone of voice, slowly pulling away from her cousin's arms and finally looking at her. She was enough self-aware that she looked like a mess. Her hair hadn't seen a comb yet, some small bruises and cuts could also still be noticed in her face, in her hands and legs. Her eyes were possibly red and swollen from her crying. She was a living painting of how she felt. "I didn't expect your forgiveness..."

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❂《 ⌜ November 16, 2024 ▎ Sometime ⌟

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Raizel wasn't sure at first if what she did was right. When she tried to step into Meyra’s personal space yesterday, it didn't go well and that ended up with a fight. A hug was a risky move but for someone who struggles in giving comfort, it was the only way she knows. Her father is whom she got it from. While he knows other methods to reach someone's heart and ease them, the hug was the most effective one for her. She was expecting to be pushed away but that made her resolve to stay even stronger. If Meyra tries, she will stand her ground, just like what she did before. She was prepared to be stubborn about it, to take any beating if that's what she wishes. If Meyra throws a tantrum, then she will stop her.

When Meyra reciprocated her hug though, her eyes widened. It was an action that she didn't expect but it did make her happy, feel relieved that she still has uses after all, even if it's just a shoulder to cry on. Gently, she gave the younger girl a gentle pat on the head, letting her cry it out even if it soaks her clothes. Meyra needed it, to release that pain that she's been holding on. For someone that does the same thing, bottling up those feelings, she knows how painful it is and crying can be hard but it's one of the best ways to just let it all out. Sometimes she wishes she could do the same but no. She has to remain strong.

Raizel didn't rush the girl, she kept her hold on her step-cousin for as long as she needed, until she herself let her go and when she did, she was ready to listen to what she had to say. She shook her head. “No, I did this to myself.” Her tone was gentle, perhaps a hint of guilt present in them, especially when she looked down. "And I should be the one apologizing. I was trying to help but in the end, it felt like I didn't help at all.” It was due to that scar that Meyra had felt bad about what she had inflicted on her. If she didn't stay in that room, if she had just left… those thoughts were running in her head. “Why wouldn't I forgive you when none of this is your fault.” a heavy sigh escaped her, imagining the stress that this might’ve caught. When she finally had the courage to look at Mey once more, she felt her heart sink.

Up close, she could see it clearly. Her messy hair, the cuts, the bruises. It was painful knowing that such a sweet girl was suffering from a condition that she didn't even want, the curse of lycanthropy. If she could… she would take it for her. “You're a mess.” Raizel chuckled, attempting to lighten the mood but that quickly vanished. “Don't add more to the burden you carry. Let me at least take this one for you.”

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⌜ Scars That Remain ⌟ | ⌜ WC: 510/200 ⌟
««««« Dialogue | #800000

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