9 Jul 2024, 13:31
Change of Pace
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❂《 ⌜ March 27, 2024 ▎ Afternoon ⌟▛▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔Last Spring Break, Raizel had decided to stay at Hogwarts, wanting to experience what it feels like being there when the busy and crowded corridors are reduced into empty spaces. It was quiet, peaceful, perfect for those wanting to have some time for themselves with not that much of a disturbance. That would've been nice for this young Gryffindor, especially when her head is filled with nothing but troubled thoughts but no. In her dark times, it was better for her to stay close to her family even though she doesn't want them knowing what is bothering her. Being at home just feels refreshing.
Ever since Raizel came back from Hogwarts, she had tried her best to be her usual cheerful self, like what she usually shows her family before but of course, she couldn't keep that mask forever. Today is one of those times. Too tired to smile, too exhausted to hide her feelings. So she just decided to stay in her room, look out of the window and stare at the distance. Those thoughts that she had before slowly came back. The failures she experienced and the lack of growth. There's also the fact that she had left one of her favorite sports, duelling.
With her lacking improvement, it sure felt that she was only a dead weight on the team. It was a hard decision to make, she doesn't want to leave yet she has to, for her team's sake. This was for the best… right? Perhaps. Yet, it sure frustrates her. Her quitting means her grandmother was right. That she wasn't cut out for duelling. If she couldn't handle that, how would she handle becoming an Auror? She wanted to prove to her that she too could reach the greatness that her family had achieved before yet that seems to be out of reach… in her current state that is.
She shouldn't have quit but the guilt of being a burden to her team is just too great for her to handle. If she wants to continue down that path then she must find a way to get better and stronger first. Not to mention, she was burned out. Who would've thought that she would reach this state, especially when she's so keen on duelling anyone before. Her lack of progress despite her efforts is the reason. The flames that once burned brightly had been reduced into nothing, leaving only a hollow husk.
What now though? While she might have quit duelling, she still needs to do some training and perhaps something that could bring that spark back to life. There is one, something that made her feel so alive.
Broom Racing.
While there is still doubt and fear that the same thing might happen there where she will just be a burden, Broom Racing would be a nice change of pace for once. She fell unconscious on her second race which is what kept her from signing up on the waitlist but… she still did. Maybe… it'll bring back that spark and she gets to cast spells and that's one of the things that she's trying to improve. Sure, it's gonna be harder than duelling considering that you need flying skills as well but she had been feeling confident when it came to that which she wasn't expecting.
Raizel turned around, gaze falling on that golden ball that she had caught during that unofficial Quidditch match that's been sitting on her desk. It might've just been luck really, heck, that was the luckiest she could get in a sports event where she usually ends up falling unconscious. Still, that victory was sweet. It felt… satisfying and somehow, gives her hope that she has a chance to achieve great things. She sure wishes it was the same for duelling but perhaps that match is telling her that she indeed, needs a change of pace, to try out other things before going back, freshen up or maybe, her calling isn’t there.
Who could blame her though? She is desperate, even now, seeking ways to grow. If that growth can't be found while duelling, then maybe, it's somewhere else. In Quidditch, in Broom Racing or some other things that she hasn't discovered yet. She'll just see. For the meantime, it'd be best to do something else than nothing. Well, her name is already on that waitlist. It's just a matter of waiting now. If she got in though, doesn't that mean she needs a broom? Sure, there's this one that she's been using, that Firebolt and she sure loves that one too but maybe there are others she could use. Then again, she doesn't have the funds for it, her allowance won't be enough for another broom.
That is also one of the reasons why she went home, to tell her parents that she wanted to try out broom sports this time but she is afraid to tell them, especially her dad. She knows he won't get angry but she can't help but feel that he would be disappointed in her for quitting duelling. Her father's an Auror, a good duellist and surely, as his daughter, he would expect her to be the same. He was proud of her when she finally joined the team and even her mother despite how concerned she was. Now that she quit, what would they feel?
Funny how the universe works really. Raizel doesn't want to face them yet and tell them her plans but fate had its other plans. A knock on her door, almost making her jump then followed by her father's voice once the door was open. “Lunch is ready Raizel.”
“R-right.” Her answer was like a soft squeaked, completely caught off guard. Looks like she might have to break the news earlier than she thought.
“What's wrong?” Ravi asked with a small smile on his face, approaching the girl slowly. He seems to have noticed that troubled look on Raizel's face.
“N-nothing… I was just thinking, that's all.” There was no lie in that. She was deep in thoughts before her father entered. So deep that it was enough to completely isolate her from reality. She wanted to ask him but she was too scared to say anything about her quitting the duelling team. Her Father is not like her grandmother, he will understand. She knows all of that yet she's struggling to get the words out, afraid of becoming a disappointment, more than she already is. She's a Gryffindor for goodness sake! She should have enough courage to tell him her plans now.
Words weren't forming.
Her father was still waiting, waiting for her to continue what she was saying, feeling like there was more. He wasn't forcing her but rather, being patient with her. He then spoke after a while. “Alright. Well, you better come down soon or your mom might get angry if you don't eat on time.” He reminded her before going on his way out.
“I quit duelling.” Raizel blurted out, grasping tight onto the hem of her shirt, head down. “I quit it.”
There were no sounds of footsteps. That means the young girl had successfully stopped her father from leaving. Breathe and then release. “I couldn't keep up… and I don't want to be a burden to anyone, not like this. I'm sorry.”
“Why are you apologizing?” A question rang coming from her father, making Raizel to finally looked up, surprised to see that the only expression that her father was showing her was… concern and confusion. She expected something else, disappointment maybe? Perhaps what she will say next will change the way her father looks at her.
“That I couldn't be a good duellist… like you. I want to become an Auror like you dad. Duelling was supposed to help me achieve that but I couldn't. Maybe… grandmother was right. Maybe I can't achieve greatness.” She sighed, head still lowered with pain present in those eyes of hers, fighting the tears that were threatening to fall as she doesn't want to show any form of weakness.
Ravi didn't speak as he entered the room, walking towards the young girl and kneeling down just in front of her. Gently, he placed a hand on her head, a soft smile on his face. “Never believe what your grandmother said to you, Raizel. None of what she said is the truth and you shouldn't apologize for quitting duelling if you think you had enough of it. That doesn't mean that you can't become an Auror though. There are plenty of other ways and you're good at spellcasting already, even learning advance spells.”
“You think I'm a good spellcaster?”
“Of course and that's already a big step to becoming an Auror and like I said, there are plenty of other ways for you to gain experience. Perhaps there's one out there that suits you more.” Ravi stood up, showing a warm smile before giving the young girl a pat on the head. “Maybe you’ll find it in Quidditch.” He was joking of course but he wouldn’t stop her if she decided to join her house’s team though. He’s a Quidditch fan too.
“I kind of signed up for Broom Racing. Well, guess it just seems fun.”
“Then I think that’s enough. What matters is that you’re having fun and from what I heard, Broom Racing allows spellcasting.”
Well, that is one reason why her interest shifted towards it, especially after seeing a certain older Gryffindor show her prowess when it comes to flying and spellcasting. She had never felt so pumped up ever since she fell into despair after all of her misfortune and perhaps it gave her another thing to try now that duelling wasn’t doing it for her. “Yeah, it has spellcasting.”
“I think it’s a perfect change of pace. You still get to do what you love the most and even get better at flying. Let’s see if we can get you a good broom for it once you’re in the team.” her father added.
“Really? And what about mom?”
“I’m sure she’ll agree. Just make sure not to get too reckless. Now come on, time for lunch.”
Raizel lets her father go first, letting everything that just happened to sink in as she sits there, looking out of the window once more. She is glad to have understanding parents, people that are okay with her decision, not a slight hint of disappointment despite quitting duelling, except for her grandmother of course. She’s the type of woman who would laugh at her for quitting and would be glad for her to quit just because she will bring shame to the family name, telling her that she’s too weak to follow through her family’s footsteps. The thought irks her so much.
No, she’ll show her what she could do and that she can still live up to their family name. She’ll prove her wrong no matter what.
▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▟⌜ Change of Pace ⌟ | ⌜ WC: 1825/200 ⌟
««««« Dialogue | #800000 | Ravi #4A0404
Oziel Toussaint | Miharu Goto
STA: 7| EVA: 12| STR: 3| WIS: 12| ARC: 10| ACC: 13
Perfectionist I | Fearless | Wandmaker | Terrible Presence
