Sadness turns to anger PVSamantha Salwis closed

The young girl's sneakers quickly hit each step of the stairs as she made her way out of the Ravenclaw tower. If she managed to be back from the dueling club within an hour, she would be able to hang out with her boyfriend for a bit. Because Bubba wasn't a prefect anymore, he had a lot more free time, especially in comparison with Samantha. The brunette was balancing her prefect duties, her role as captain, and her schoolwork with her friends and boyfriend. It all kept her really busy and left little time to relax, but the young girl was okay with that.

The thousand things she was doing kept her distracted from the letter from home, well, more the lack of them. Her parents hadn't written her once in the past month, which got the girl quite worried. In the few letters she had gotten from her sister, fights between her parents about her dad's work were mentioned. These comments were usually followed by a 'reassuring' phrase that it was adult stuff and she shouldn't worry about it because it would all be fine. Of course, the prefect did worry about it. How could she not?

As she was getting closer, she could hear somebody practicing, which was quite surprising considering the time. At this time, the dueling club was usually quiet as it was an awkward hour for most students. Due to her overfull schedule, it was one of the few times Samantha could train. Besides, as a dueling captain, she needed to be on top of her game so she preferred to practice extra alone so nobody could see her fail. After doubting a but, she continued her path.

Now able to recognize the voice, she realized it was Eun-ji, one of her teammates. After a troubling fallout at the ball last year, the two had managed to live in peace next to each other. In the beginning, it had hurt Samantha a lot to be around the older Ravenclaw who had made it clear she didn't want to be friends with her, but after a while, it got easier. Samantha was just happy she and Eun-ji got along better than she and Dee did after their idiotic fight in May.

Another thing that became clear as she reached the doors: Eun-ji was mad. The brunette didn't think she had ever heard this tone in the older girl's voice. Eun-ji was always calm, and reasonable. As the other was saying something in Korean, Samantha walked into the room, a tad more quiet than normal. She was trying to gather her thoughts on what to do. It was worrying to see her teammate this way, but she didn't know if it was her place to say something. This was Eun-ji. The one who had made it clear she didn't want Samantha close to her. But this was also the one person who was always so collected and clearly she wasn't now.

In the end, Samantha cared too much for Eun-ji to ignore it. "Hey!" she would yell out over the loud spell casting. "Eun-ji," she tried to get the other's attention as she placed her hair in a pony tail. "Are you okay?" she asked worried. When the other girl would stop casting spell, Samantha would walk over to her. Eyebrows slightly raised, question look in her blue eyes and her head lightly tilted to the left.

IC Date April 29th, 2023 - Blue in English, Red in Korean

Noise…so much noise. Was duelling always this loud or was it her fault? “Eun-ji.” It was as if the witch couldn’t hear anything until her name was called. Then she froze. Like a deer caught in the headlights. At first, she didn’t dare to turn around and look at the owner of the voice. Then again, she didn’t have to. It was far too familiar to her at this point. Careless, her brain hissed at her. And wasn’t that true? What was she thinking? Even if no one was here when she entered, it didn’t mean no one could come in later. She never acted like this in front of others. Eun-ji was always careful not to let her emotions go haywire, where she could be potentially spotted. Although to be fair, she didn’t plan for this to happen. She came here to train…perhaps a bit more intensively than usual but not like this. Eun-ji was absolutely mortified. Still, she couldn't keep avoiding the other person in the room forever.

At last, the Ravenclaw took a deep breath and turned around to face her captain. She lowered her wand, her free hand clenched in fist, nails digging deep into her palm painfully. It would probably leave marks but it helped her to stay sane. Was she okay? Of course not. “Yes, I’m sorry.” It came out a little strained but her voice didn’t shake. That in itself was a huge achievement. “Did you come here to practise? I’ll get out of your hair if that’s the case.” It was a bit strange talking to Sam like this. She has come to respect her a great deal as her captain but considering their history, that was as far as their interactions went. Eun-ji was too ashamed to cross the line and Samantha probably didn’t want to get close to her either. Which was fine of course. It was what she wanted, wasn’t it? Except...it really wasn’t.

The Ravenclaw never meant to hurt Sam nor Lucia for that matter and yet that's precisely what she ended up doing to both of them. Had it not been for her maternal grandparents, she wouldn't have to say all those horrible things. It was all their fault. At least that's what she kept telling to herself. It made things a little more bearable…otherwise how could she even live with herself? Let alone pretend she was completely fine. In a way, it somewhat funny. When she parted ways with her junior during the ball, the young girl was the one who cried. She was unsure of herself and still a bit frightened by the attack in the Ravenclaw tower but Eun-ji knew she'd be fine. Now it was her, who was suddenly very unsure of everything. At times like these, Eun-ji hardly recognised herself, what a shock it must have been for the other girl? I suppose karma does exist after all.

The older girl was still clutching her fist tightly but the tension was slowly leaving her shoulders. It was still a stark contrast to her usual calmness but compared to the rage she was in a mere seconds ago…? Well, not everybody could turn on the switch like she could. Eun-ji really wanted to disappear right that moment but there was something that absolutely needed to be said. “I know it’s unfair of me to ask you anything but could you maybe just…forget all this? I’ll be more careful next time.”

@Samantha Salwis

The young girl was unsure if the other purposely ignored her or just hadn't noticed yet. After Eun-ji's name echoed through the dueling club, she froze. Samantha was confused by the reactions as it was very out of character for Eun-ji. "Eun-ji?" she repeated the name in a higher pitch. Why was she acting so weird? When the raven-haired student turned around, Samantha noticed the hand that was clutched around the wand, showing signs of stress.

A bit hesitant, the prefect took a few steps closer to the other. "You don't seem okay," she replied, a frown forming on her face. She wanted to comfort Eun-ji but wasn't sure how the other would react, so she kept an appropriate distance. "Yes but no," she answered quickly. "Yes, I did come to practice but please stay." The brunette took a moment to think about her next words. Was it her place to help Eun-ji? But she still cared for the older girl and she was her dueling captain and prefect. "I am worried about you."

It seemed that the older girl relaxed a bit but was still on edge. "Forget all this?" she repeated the words carefully. "Why?" She tilted her head in confusion. It was impossible to act like nothing had happened and the small girl wouldn't give up trying to figure out what was going. "I know we aren't close friends anymore but I still care," she admitted. A gentle comforting smile appeared on her face as she looked up at the older girl. She didn't feel as small as she did a year ago when their friendship, if it could be even called that, had fallen apart. In the past year, the brunette had grown a lot and she wasn't the little girl with a broken heart anymore.

"I am here to listen," she promised. "Please talk to me. I promise I won't tell anybody anything, just let me help," she begged the older girl. It hurt the prefect to see her old friend like this and she had no idea what was going on. During the time they didn't speak, the young girl liked to imagine that Eun-ji was having a great time, making lots of new friends, and getting amazing grades. She wanted the other to be happy, even if it meant she wasn't in her life.

IC Date April 29th, 2023 - Blue in English, Red in Korean

It took every ounce of strength not to step back when the girl decided to come closer. Still, Eun-ji stood her ground. It would only make things worse. She’d look weak and vulnerable and she couldn’t allow that to happen. If nothing else, at least she didn't want to look scared. Considering her words, Sam already knew her teammate was anything but okay. It made sense of course. The scene she just witnessed was the exact opposite of what one would associate with Eun-ji Lee Hunt. Perhaps, she’ll just go and practice so I can leave in peace. Alas, it appeared she would not be let off the hook that easily.

“I am worried about you.” Hearing the words, something that Eun-ji had not felt in a long time sprouted within her heart. It was like sorrow. Her chest hurt a bit, but it also felt warm. Logically speaking, she knew there were still people that worried about her but nobody really said it aloud anymore. It was an unspoken understanding that led to nothing. Sam was not someone to just leave things without even trying however. She stood tall and sounded confident…so unlike the young girl she remembered. Back than, Eun-ji was the strong one but now they somehow held the opposite roles. The fourth year was still strong but she was broken. She knew as much. Nevertheless, as long as she could hold the pieces together, she would be fine.

Eun-ji made an attempt to remove herself from the situation as soon as possible but failed miserably. Her captain couldn’t seem to comprehend why she should just forget the whole affair. This is where they were very different. The older girl liked forgetting things. If she head to deal with everything that went wrong in her life, it would drive her insane. “I know we aren't close friends anymore but I still care.” The next phrase brought her back from her musing. “Hm?” Now it was her turn to be confused. Eun-ji knew Sam was a good person but there should always be limits to one's good will. After what she did to her, it was good enough that they shared a mutual respect. And if either of them was allowed to care secretly, it should have been the older girl. She was not the one who got hurt. Well…she did but it was her own call. This whole situation really made her feel ashamed.

Let me help…the words kept replaying in her head like a broken record. “Why?” Eun-ji repeated the brunette’s earlier question. Even to her own ears she sounded genuinely confused. Why would she want to help her? It was just strange to her. She no longer believed anyone would be there for her and she dreaded the day she no longer believed in herself either. Even her own parents didn’t offer to help. Her mother was too scared and feigned ignorance while her dad may have wanted to help but knew he didn't have the ability to do so. Sam couldn’t help either but unlike her father, she didn’t know that. “You can’t help me, Sam.” It was the first time in forever that Eun-ji called her that. It felt too familiar. Something only her friends should be allowed to call her. However right now, it felt like she needed to do so in order to get the message across. “I don’t think anybody can.” The offer was tempting though. Eun-ji wasn't scared of falling. By now, she had fallen many times and would not doubt do so again in the future. But falling still hurt. If someone was there to catch her, wouldn’t it make her life a little bit easier? The issue was, finding someone that would be able to catch her without them getting hurt in the process. “Life is tricky…it can’t be helped. I just consider myself unlucky.” She sighed then, suddenly feeling very exhausted. “I shouldn't have lost control like that. I'm sorry.”

@Samantha Salwis

It seemed to confuse the other that Samantha admitted she still cared for her. Despite the way Eun-ji had treated her, it was impossible for her not to look up to the other at least a little. In times when she needed advice and guidance the other had given it to her. It had been Eun-ji to tell her, a scared and lost first-year, what to do during the spider attack in the Ravenclaw tower. It had been Eun-ji that had been there to give advice about what to tell her parents.

"Why wouldn't I?" Samantha returned the question. If she could help, why wouldn't she? It was a simple thing for the young girl. As long as it didn't break any rules or went against her morals, helping was a good thing. Her mother always told her she should treat people the way she wants to be treated. Being a happy person herself, she always wanted others to be the same. Why dwell and be sad when there was so much to enjoy in life?

Her eyes narrowed when Eun-ji said she couldn't help. If somebody were to decide what she could or couldn't do it was herself, not somebody else. "I can still try," she replied fiery. "I am not like anyone else. Maybe I am the perfect person to help," she said a bit cocky. If Samantha was one thing it was confident, maybe a bit overconfident at times. She wouldn't just give up trying to help her old friend. Even if thousands of people had tried to help Eun-ji, nobody was like her, so maybe she would come up with a super creative solution. Who knew?

The older girl seemed to open up a bit, saying she just considered herself unlucky. A curious look appeared on Samantha's face as she took another step closer to Eun-ji, wondering what she was talking about. The sigh the other left out showed how drained she was, and Samantha couldn't help but feel sorry for Eun-ji. "It's okay," she replied softly, placing her hand on Eun-ji's shoulder in the hopes to give some comfort. If the fourth year wouldn't break the physical contact, Samantha would lead them to the benches so they could sit down. "I don't have any cookies with me now or I would have given them to you. Food always helps make me feel happy when I am sad," she shared, showing she only wanted to help.

IC Date April 29th, 2023 - Blue in English, Red in Korean

“Why wouldn't I?” Why wouldn’t she? What kind of question was that? Wasn’t it obvious? Eun-ji didn’t feel like explaining though so she didn’t say anything. It felt like too much effort. In fact, at this very moment everything felt like too much effort. Even her bones felt somehow heavier. What a strange feeling.

The witch tried persuading Sam to let it go but it just wasn’t working. Her captain was too stubborn. On one hand, she grew up a lot since last time they talked properly yet at the same time she was still rather naive. Her conviction that she could help simply because she was extremely determined to do so was unrealistic to say the least. She is still a child after all. Of course, Eun-ji herself was also very young but it felt like she had lost all her childlike behaviour in the last two years. Was that how others perceived her as well or was it just her? She couldn’t say for sure…then again it’s not like she cared all that much. Nevertheless, the Ravenclaw had to admit she was somewhat jealous of Sam’s mindset. “That’s a nice sentiment but honestly I doubt it.” It was not that Eun-ji deemed Sam incompetent but her reality was not something that could be changed easily. Maybe it was not completely impossible like she insisted but it would require very drastic methods. Perhaps drastic enough to send her to prison however, she didn’t dare to voice such thing aloud. “The difficulty of helping me is akin to moving a mountain. Can you move a mountain, Sam?” The older girl asked seriously. Yes, the Hunts’ presence in her life was indeed heavy and unmovable…just like a mountain full of sharp stones.

Ah…I shouldn’t have said that. Eun-ji mentally scolded herself upon seeing the curious look appearing on her captain’s face. Finally, the other girl made a decision to close the distance and rob Eun-ji of her safe space. The witch in question clutched her fist even harder and flinched slightly when a hand landed on her shoulder. Still, she didn’t move away, recognizing the gesture for what it was. Sam was simply trying to comfort her. It was not a good way to go about it but she didn’t have the heart to shake it off. Distracted by the gesture, Eun-ji didn’t even realise she was being led to the benches until it was too late. What do you want me to do Sam? She wondered briefly. “That’s okay…I don’t particularly enjoy sweets.” In the past, she would have agreed that food was a good source of comfort but once she started eating alone, it suddenly become more depressing affair than anything else. Eun-ji still enjoyed eating home cooked meal but it wasn’t quite the same when she had no one to share it with. That’s probably why she was so delighted when Hana joined her last week.

Coming back to reality, Eun-ji stared at her clenched fists now lying in her lap. She couldn’t seem relax. This situation was making her anxious and she had absolutely no idea what to say…

@Samantha Salwis

The two duelists both had very different ideas of how this interaction would be going and it did not help the conversation at all. When the older girl questioned her ability to help, Samantha was very displeased. "I can try to move a mountain!" she said confidently. " Besides, I can just listen, I don't have to solve your problem," she nodded. "That way you don't have to move a mountain but you can try to find a way through it, or maybe over it! Moving a whole mountain just to get to the other side seems a bit extra," she rambled.

While being led to the benches, Eun-ji shared some shocking information. "What do you mean?" Samantha asked in utter disbelief. "You don't like sweets?!" Shaking her head, the brunette sat down. "Maybe that's why you are so upset," she said thoughtfully. Even though it sounded like a joke, the third year was serious. It was impossible for her to imagine a life without sweets where she was happy. Despite meaning well, she still got sidetracked and forgot about the whole reason why they were even sitting down like that for a second. It was a hard task for Samantha to wrap her head around the information Eun-ji had just shared.

After being quiet for a few seconds, she turned to the older duelist again. "You can just talk to me," she said, her bright blue eyes staring at Eun-ji. "I won't judge or give any advice if you don't want it," she promised. Not judging or giving advice would be very hard for her, but she could still try, she had to try. "And as soon as I walk out of here, I will forget all of this and we can act like it never happened," she offered. Honestly, her curiosity was killing her, she wanted to know what was wrong so badly. Her reasons to help weren't completely selfless.

IC Date April 29th, 2023 - Blue in English, Red in Korean

“I can try to move a mountain!” Eun-ji couldn’t help but throw her junior a somewhat unamused look. She knew Sam meant well and probably only wanted to express her sincerity but that statement was simply too ridiculous. Still, she didn’t say anything and let the other girl finish her thought. As expected, it was a kind yet highly unhelpful thought. Eun-ji could not possibly climb over Hunts and she had tried to push her way through but they were indeed like a mountain. The more she tried to ram into those rocks, the more she got hurt while they remained completely unaffected. She supposed the only way was to crawl underneath however, that prospect sounded dirty and terribly exhausting. The witch honestly wasn’t sure if she had enough energy left to even attempt it. “I admire your optimism.” She remarked sounding almost amused. Perhaps if she shared Samantha’s attitude, she’d be doing much better now but in her current situation, it was hard to keep a positive outlook on pretty much anything. Truth be told, Eun-ji was exhausted. She has been for a while now. Every relationship and every waking moment felt like too much work. Alas that was not something she was willing to share with the other girl.

Thankfully, Sam was soon distracted by her lack of appreciation for sweets. Eun-ji was very much used to that expression by now and mostly found it funny. It took so little to throw people off. “It’s not that I hate sweets but I grew up mostly without them and got used to not eating them. I also have to keep an eye on my diet so it helps that I don’t crave sugar as often as other kids do.” She shrugged. Eun-ji was a ballerina and needed to keep in shape. Although to be fair, she was very thin so eating some candy here and there would made no difference with the amount of exercise she had. “I can confidently say that is not the cause of any of my problems. Besides, me not liking sweets means there is more left for others. Isn’t that a good thing?”

The older girl hoped this little trivia brought their previous topic to an end but it was just a wishful thinking on her part. Samantha may have been easily distracted but it was not enough to forget the truly important things. In general, that was a good character trait however, it really didn’t play into Eun-ji’s cards today. Still, she wasn’t too worried. There was nothing Sam could judge her for. Well besides the occasional vicious thoughts Eun-ji seemed to have once in a while as of late…but those were just thoughts. She never acted on them and didn’t plant to do so in the future either. She also didn’t plan to share them with anyone so that was that. The root of all that anger were the Hunts and she couldn’t be judged for being their granddaughter. As for the advice, she doubted her Captain could provide any even if she wanted to. “It’s nothing really. Just some good old family issues…we all have them, don’t we?” I can't tell you more...it's not something you can just forget. Eun-ji looked at Sam. She has calmed down now, sounding pretty casual…or rather like she just couldn’t be bothered to care. “A family is the most unreasonable human relationship. You don't even get to choose it yourself, but there's so much responsibility and effort involved. It just gets frustrating sometimes. I guess I needed to let it out today but I’m fine now so you don’t have to look so concerned.”

The witch was no longer looking her captain as she said this. She felt far too uncomfortable, talking about feelings even if it barely scratched the surface. She was pretty good at changing topics though. “Glad to see you doing well though. See…I told you you’d be okay. You even got yourself a boyfriend. I trust he treats you well?” She did genuinely want to know this. Despite distancing herself from Samantha back then, she still cared even if she didn't let it show most of the time. Sometimes, Eun-ji still regretted being so harsh back then but she doubted she’d be a good role model for anybody now. Yeah, it was definitely better this way.

@Samantha Salwis

Eun-ji stated that she admired Samantha's optimism, but the brunette noticed the tone the older girl's words carried. Did Eun-ji think her attitude was funny? Had the comment been a compliment or a way to poke fun at her? A little debate was going on in her mind. Samantha shook the thought off, Eun-ji wouldn't make fun of her like that.

Right?

Growing up without sweets sounded awful. The only kid Samantha knew that had grown up without sweets had dentists as parents and they hated candy. Her mom was pretty strict about how much candy she ate, but at least she was allowed to eat them. On top of that, her mom couldn't check how much candy she ate because she was at Hogwarts and her mom was in London. "Diet?" the brunette wondered. That sounded awful, she always ate what she wanted and couldn't imagine watching your food every day. "Maybe it is," she giggled. "Maybe it is one of the unknown side effects of not eating sweets!" The young girl took a moment to think about Eun-ji's argument. "I guess that is true," she nodded slowly. "If you ever get candy you don't want, you can always give them to me!"

Family issues weren't something the prefect had too much experience with, yet. During her younger years, her parents always shielded her and her sister from all the drama that was going on. This lead to the girls being blissfully unaware of everything, and, especially Samantha, being quite naïve. "Yes," she agreed with Eun-ji confidently. "I sometimes fight with my sister." She was sure this was what the older student meant. "My sister also used to fight a lot with my parents. My dad says that it is just how teenagers are," she shrugged. Listening carefully, she waited until Eun-ji was done speaking. Honestly, she had never thought of her family in that at all way. In her eyes, her family was perfect. Samantha wasn't aware of the many cracks her parents had covered to make sure she could have that perfect picture of her family. However, little cracks had started to show in the seemingly perfect picture and it would soon shatter into a million pieces. "But I am concerned," she replied simply.

With the mention of her boyfriend, her eyes lit up and a dreamy smile appeared on her face. "Yes, he does," she said as a little blush appeared on her face. The thought of Bubba's beautiful eyes made her nervous and extremely happy at the same time. "He is absolutely amazing! He is super funny and so sweet," she shared. "We are together a lot. Well, when I have time. Being dueling captain and prefect while also keeping my grades up is pretty hard but Bubba understands it. He was prefect and broom racing captain as well, so he knows how busy it can be," she shared. "We sometimes just listen to music together and it is amazing. I also learned him my amazing disco dance moves," she giggled. She could spend hours talking about the boy and just forget about everything else.