ehhhhehehhehe I get it
Just pour another cup of coffee! 

I don't want to study for finals

Skip school for those days

My friend wants to get his you know what cut off. What do I do to make him not?

This kid in my class wanted me to do this so please don't get mad at me

He wants to cut off his hair? Well that's surely his business. I think you should encourage him, and even bring him the chainsaw.

I'm drawing a man and I know that soon I'll have to do his hair. I hate drawing hair, what do I do?

Go up to strangers in the street and cut their hair off to put on your drawing. I'm sure they won't mind.

I'm broke as a joke and need money for lip injections yeet. How do I make money?

Simple. Cut off someone's lips and add them to your lips. #LifeHacks

My fish has been sleeping for 2 weeks now. How do I wake him up?

He's not sleeping.

I keep biting my fingernails and can't stop!

just eat your nails, once they're gone you'll have nothing to chew.

I forgot how to breathe

stick your head underwater and ask fish for advice.

my roof shingles are loose

An Elmer's glue stick should do the trick!

I got a haircut and I don't know if I like it...

Just cut off all your hair, then you won't have to worry about whether or not you like it.

People around me are too loud and are giving me anxiety