Bad Advice

Well, for starters, you can invite some friends over & play baseball inside the house. You can then get your little cousins to play tag. You can mess up some file folders after. That’s sure to make the counters seem very clean.

(For the real advice, I’d say set 20 minutes aside each day to clean a small area of the house)

How can I not come off as manipulative?

Feed the dog all of your other homework! That will take the teacher’s attention off of your project!

I ran into a door and hurt my chin (hypothetically). What should I do?

*evil grin* kill it!

I’m hearing voices inside my head, what should I do (hypothetically)?

Hide the body in your parents bedroom so they know you’ll get all the rest of your homework done!

(Hypothetically) I’m a murderer. What should I do?

Kill it again in front of all the muggles you find. Be sure to use a spell on it!

Hahahahahahahahahahhaahahahahhaahahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahaha

My new problem:

I—hahahahahahahhahaha— ca—hahahahahahahaa—n’t stop hahahahahahahahahah laugh—hahahahahahha—ing

You should wait for me ‘cause I’ll be right back! (No, really!) it’s a proven cure to hahahahahahahahahhahaha laughter! Hehehehe

Here’s an issue: I want to eat less sugar, how can anyone help me?

By giving you the advice, not to eat anything for three weeks. After that you won't have anymore problems with eating sugar.

My teachers always say, that I am to quiet. How can I change that?

Make sure you hold a grudge against everybody and don't talk to them.

I can't stop putting stuff in my mouth