Folded Feelings PV Flash Finished

@Flash Holmwood

Flash didn’t seem happy about being asked to complete his sentence, but there were few things Ruka liked less than hanging onto a half finished thought; if you started something you were supposed to finish it, weren’t you?

Willow thought he was someone special then, but the thought didn’t elicit a smile from the Slytherin for some reason. Maybe he was still feeling upset about the fact that Ruka had made him say it out loud. Still, the Gryffindor let the corners of his mouth tug upwards, a genuinely fond expression settling on his face soon to be replaced with slight confusion about Flash’s description of his best friend. It wasn’t something Ruka could really claim to understand, was nothing he would have ever said of anybody he knew.

Flash stayed close to Willow to bask in the light she shed onto the world?

It sounded strange, somehow, like Willow was the sun and Flash the otherwise dark, shadowy earth, twirling around its own axis to gather as much light as possible from every possible angle. Unequal somehow; The sun would keep existing without the Earth but the Earth would slowly but surely rot and die without the sun.

Shaking his head to himself, Ruka decided to not read that much into the thought. Relationships were different between different people and while Ruka saw Jack as someone who made him feel complete somehow, made him feel like he could see the whole picture of something he’d only been granted glimpses of before, Flash might be thinking of Willow as someone who pulled him from the darkness. Who was he to judge when he had absolutely no clue how friends and family were actually supposed to work?

Hopeful that maybe at least talking some more about his little brother was something that would keep conversation up, Ruka found himself fighting off the disappointment when Flash simply claimed to remember his offer of listening to him talk rather than actually saying anything else. Their rapport was dying and the Gryffindor could feel that it was mostly due to his own lack of social skills, his lack of grace, his ineptitude as a conversationalist. Hopefully he was going to get better with practice, so that at some point he'd be able to really talk to Flash rather than just interrogate and talk at him.

At least, it seemed, Flash was starting to understand that not everything Ruka said he did so with the intention of being harmful in some way, but that he genuinely struggled to hold a conversation, ask the right questions in the right way. Tact was not his strength, not in the way Flash appeared to have mastered it so effortlessly.

"I suppose," he answered the other boy's explanation as to why he wanted to be adored, a moment of internal turmoil making itself visible across Ruka's face. Did everyone want to be liked? Did he? Maybe to a different degree but wasn't it one of his greatest fears that the one person he had opened up to so far might end up not liking him anymore? Wasn't that such a big reason for why he was acting so different from what he knew himself to be like? Was it just ingrained in all of them, this obsession for validation from other people who's opinions they valued? What an outright terrifying thought.

"It seems scary," he admitted after thinking it through for a while. "Never really being in control of how other people see you. I suppose I'd just... I'd often rather they don't see me at all than for someone I don't want to come across as." With that he shrugged his shoulders sadly before deciding to drop the subject. The atmosphere was low enough, Ruka's own sullen mind dragging them into a darkness he didn't really want to bring to the breakfast table. Maybe moving on to other topics would bring some light back to their conversation.
Flash’s words about the importance of names, however, left Ruka feeing lost, gaze drifting into nothingness for a moment as he tried to make sense of what the Slytherin was saying. Was it a matter of respect then, to be talking about people by their preferred name to others? Had he been doing something incredibly wrong by...

“So I shouldn’t...” he started, trying to put the concept into a situation he might be able to understand better through personal experience. “I shouldn’t call Jack -“ He stopped himself. “Burnett,” he corrected with a grimace crossing his face. Calling Jack by his last name felt fundamentally wrong by now, he had been refusing to use it for so long. “- by his first name around other people because it’s not the name he would want them to call him? Is that... Has that been wrong of me?” A genuine expression of guilt crossed his face at the thought. The last thing he had wanted to display was disrespect or a form of carelessness with Jack’s preferences. It was simply habit by now, a familiarity he wasn’t sure he was going to be able to shake.

What Ruka had thought of as a display of closeness, fondness even, Flash seemed to be calling a bad habit and as much as the Gryffindor had been and still was trying to understand everyone’s obsession with the names they were called, he couldn’t completely wrap his head around it. Sure, Jack didn’t like people to use his first name because he wanted to avoid the sense of familiarity that came with it, he could understand as much, but what was the harm in calling a friend or brother by their nickname in conversation?

All Ruka had taken Flash calling his brother “Val” as was a sign of adoration, not an invitation to use the nickname himself. People and their social etiquette would surely never fail to exhaust him.

Whether he'd been doing something wrong or not almost seemed irrelevant when faced with what Flash's brother apparently had to deal with in his job; Death Threats was something so fundamentally bad that a butchered name here and there hardly seemed to matter at all. Who really cared about being called an affectionate nickname when other people were literally threatening your life?

It almost felt insulting that Flash put that matter into the same sentence as paperwork, like it was nothing but a minor inconvenience.

"Death threats," he repeated, a look of pure terror crossing his face. "That has to be illegal, isn't it?" Flash's statement that Valerius simply had to take what he got sounded like defeat in a battle nobody had even tried to win. "Surely there must be something he could do against those at least, right?" Shaking his head to himself, Ruka took a deep breath as if he needed to steady himself again after receiving such information. "Does that mean he's constantly in danger?" he asked, worry lacing his voice. If there were people who sent death threats then surely there were also those willing to act on them, right? "Are you and your family?" The thought was terrifying, but Ruka's mind was prone to expecting the worst because it was the only way to be prepared for everything.

Hopefully Flash and his family had taken precautions for any possibly lunatics wanting to cause them harm.

While the explanation of Valerius' burdens was surely meant to show Ruka what was so admirable about Flash's brother and why his career was not exactly desirable, the only thing the Gryffindor could really take away from it was that people, as a whole, were dumb and dangerous and destructive.

The little shrug and confirmation that Flash enjoyed his brother's company elicited a small smile from Ruka, and the Gryffindor nodded approvingly. While the other boy didn't seem to want to elaborate any more on what exactly it was he personally enjoyed about his brother's company - Ruka was still at a loss of who Valerius actually was as a person; Was he funny? Compassionate? Sensitive, affectionate, considerate, practical, witty? - at least he had given up on talking about how others enjoyed it as well. Maybe that was progress, or maybe just another reason for Flash to shut his thoughts inside his own head never to be released again. It was, as always when it came to this particular Slytherin, difficult to tell.

With the topic turning to something lighter in substance, such as libraries and reading and books, Ruka found himself hopeful that the mood might be lifted, but somehow it remained just as dreary. Maybe it was the circumstance, maybe he'd been making a mistake in trying to incorporate more light hearted topics in what was a straining conversation as a whole, but now he had already started down that path and he wasn't going to back out of it just because it wasn't going exactly the way he wanted it to.

Flash immediately latched onto Ruka's use of the word "favourite", describing how he hated picking those, a sentiment that made the Gryffindor perk up a little in interest. "I like that," he said thoughtfully, a little smile dancing on his lips as he let the words wash over him. Enjoying things freely without making one out to be the best; Ruka had never thought of picking favourites as a way of making a statement but he found himself intrigued by Flash's own stance on the matter.

Chuckling, Ruka reached out to give the little paper cat a poke with his index finger. "Suppose I made this one for nothing then," he joked light heartedly. "When I should have really made you a whole zoo instead." Well, there was still time for adding more animals to their collection, so maybe, some day, there would be an equal representation of all of them. Doubtful but possible.

Keeping the relaxed expression on his face, Ruka leaned forward a bit in interest as Flash continued talking about the things he found interesting in books; Characters, mysteries, drama. It correlated with the way Flash had claimed to like people's stories back at the Ball. He seemed interested in how people worked, not just in books but also in life, something Ruka had a hard time relating to when the majority of people he had encountered throughout his life had shunned him and treated him like dirt. Even after near to two years of Hogwarts it was different to shake those experiences.

"I've never read a comic, or a mystery series," he admitted, propping his elbows up on the table and resting his chin on the palms of his hands for a moment. "Maybe you could show me a couple sometime." Presumptuous maybe, to expect Flash to be willing to get together with him again for the sake of exchanging reading material, but Ruka didn't know how else to express his genuine interest to the other boy. "I'd really like to... to see what you enjoy about them for myself." It would surely help him understand Flash better as well, adding to the fact that he liked to read and would have been interested in new books either way.

Nodding encouragingly to communicate his understanding of what Flash had said and to try to chase away the slight insecurity with which his words had trailed off, Ruka shuffled around in his seat until he was more comfortable, shoulders straight, back arched. Sitting down for such an extended amount of time had made his posture slump, his body whine in protest. He was a dancer, sitting still for so long felt restrictive enough to start making him feel restless.

Still, listening to Flash talk about his early education was interesting enough to make him feel like he could endure it a little longer.

"Not really," Ruka admitted when Flash asked him if things were making sense, a shake of his head accompanying his words. What appeared to be completely normal to the other boy was giving the Gryffindor a headache just by trying to keep up with all the new information he was gathering in this part of the conversation alone. "Why do... independent schools - right? - accept anybody as long as they pay for that spot? What about people who don't have enough money, why aren't they good enough to go there?" It was a big question, probably, and Ruka reached up to rub at his temples. "Actually, you don't need to go into that," he said, sighing slightly. He was already confused enough and talking about how money clearly ruled the world and what that meant for those who had none would most likely just make him angry.

Waving a hand dismissively as if ready to move on from the topic, Ruka stopped in his tracks for a second as he thought of one more thing he wanted to ask. "You said you didn't have a lot of friends aside from people on your football team," he pointed out, eyebrows knitted together. "Was that a school thing? Football, I mean. Were they friends from school?" Maybe it was irrelevant to Flash, but to Ruka... He wanted to know about the other boy’s experiences with school and his home life, wanted to know if he had made his friends at school or outside of it during holidays, wanted to know if Flash had felt himself fitting in well with all the other rich kids or if he’d found connections in different ways.

With that last question out of the way and Ruka having shuffled around to avoid physical contact aside from their joint hands, the Gryffindor offered Flash a small smile of his own, nodding his agreement when the Slytherin asked for their next get together to involve more fun and less questions. It was easy to assume that Flash meant what he said considering how tense he had seemed talking about himself. “Alright,” he said softly, taking a sip of his pumpkin juice. “Though, for what it’s worth,” he added, unable to stop himself. “I like hearing about you. Just... Just so you know. About your life and what you like or don’t like.” Swallowing heavily he gave Flash’s hand a squeeze. “So thank you for this.” Using his free hand he gesticulated vaguely around him as if to indicate the entire encounter.

With Flash’s agreement to have breakfast with him, Ruka pulled the stacks of paper into his lap to make some room for actual food, careful to not damage their origami animals as he did so. Reaching for the little frog again, Ruka held it up for Flash to see. “Do you think I could keep this one?” he asked gently. “I like it a lot.”

At what Flash had tried to explain about his thoughts on being liked, Ruka seemed to become upset. A lot of what Flash said seemed to garner this reaction, he wasn’t sure whether Ruka was confused or disappointed. At the very least it was becoming increasingly clear that Ruka’s worldview was so far removed from Flash’s as to be unrecognizable. Even though he didn’t want to be constantly disappointing Ruka, he was feeling ever so slightly more secure in his understanding. He still didn’t understand Ruka’s thoughts, but he could at least stop misinterpreting his reactions as something someone else would think.

He seemed to think it was scary to want to be liked, being that you couldn’t really control it. Flash agreed, though instead of it making him want to hide away, it made him want to master it. It wasn’t exactly easy to do what Flash did, and it came at steep costs, but it was possible to figure out how to be liked. It wasn’t as though it didn’t have incredible benefits once one was there, it wasn’t as sad and scary an endeavor as Ruka and Burnett imagined it. Sometimes it was lovely, made him feel like he was connected, like he had control. He could only imagine how much better it would get with time, once he honed his skills even further, and had more time to build a reputation.

Ruka seemed to find the idea of hiding away a lot more attractive, which Flash could actually understand quite well. That was also, possibly, innate. If he tried to think of it like prehistoric human interaction, before the advent of lush language, you could still see the benefit of being socially connected, and how that would result in more resources and safety. Meanwhile, if one of them ‘appeared’ threatening, they might be ousted, rejected, or killed. If that was true, it would be better to run away oneself before the clan came and enforced the group dynamic. Though that would likely lead to death as well, being alone. The only way to survive was to assimilate.

When Ruka started to grow worried over his calling Burnett ‘Jack’, Flash shook his head, not realizing he even had the power to make Ruka reconsider something he had been doing for so long. It was different when they talked about Burnett, Ruka actually seemed to care a lot more what he thought than everyone else on the planet combined.

”You can ask him if you like, but… if you’re going to be brothers I don’t think it could be bothering him that much. Maybe it used to, but it’s not like he wouldn’t tell you… I think.” Flash tapped his jaw with one finger while trying to return to Burnett’s mindset. ”He might even like it. ‘Ruka can call me that, but you can’t’, you know? He likes making people question things.”

Deeper into the conversation, when Flash was describing a politician’s job, Ruka paled at the mention of death threats, something that stood out to him as a huge red flag. Rightfully so, though Flash had gotten used to it. Even George Henry had accepted it easily as well, though he was clearly much more accustomed to that world than Ruka was. Any public figure with enough of a presence got death threats. Humans liked to threaten death, even though most of them were merely words of seething anger rather than true intention of violence. It was a piece of control everyone had, no matter how weak or stupid they were. They could still kill someone, if they had to.

”It’s technically illegal, I suppose. If it seems like a real enough threat, it can be investigated. They’ve certainly stopped a few dangerous wizards from attacking the Ministry in the past. They aren’t all serious though. Just angry people lashing out. Taking it out on the person who they think is the cause of their problems, no matter how true that is.” It was something that had terrified him in his youth as well. He loved Val dearly, and the thought of people wanting to kill him kept him up at night. Val had been patient and kind enough to sit with him and explain everything to his satisfaction. The Ministry was a safe place for its workers, there were protection charms everywhere. ”I don’t think the family has been threatened though, not that I know of anyway. We have cameras and a security team. Not to mention we live miles away from civilization. It wouldn’t be very easy to attack us. A single person who hates squibs isn’t going to manage it.”

Flash couldn’t help but feel the creeping rosiness in his cheeks return when Ruka said he liked something that he said. He really was caught off guard every time, with how Ruka talked and how little Flash could predict his reaction. Once the conversation would be going for a while, he would get used to Ruka’s somber disappointment, only to blush when it was turned into something like admiration. It was difficult to manage his reactions in those conditions. It was still subtle, hopefully unnoticeable in its smaller instances. Flash wanted to laugh when Ruka said he should have made him a whole zoo of animals. Something in the pit of his stomach fluttered, but he tried to crush it down.

”These ones are fine.” He said quietly.

When Ruka showed interest in reading a comic or mystery novel, Flash nodded in quiet affirmation. He would have to go through his books and pick one he thought might appeal to Ruka. For someone he understood more thoroughly, it would have been a simpler task, but he wasn’t worried about getting something absolutely perfect. Just something that would perhaps spark a flame of curiosity about reading more in the genre, something representative and engaging. After a few attempts and learning a bit more, he would be able to predict Ruka’s tastes better and curate something more precise.

Ruka’s understanding of the school system seemed to have not been helped much by Flash’s explanation. He had picked a part which anyone would have questioned, but Flash wasn’t particularly in the mood to hold up a staunch defense of the point of independent schools to begin with, it was an argument as old as the school itself, hundreds and hundreds of years.

”There are a lot of arguments you could make for either side, but just to give you something to think about… you could think of it as less of an exclusion and more of an addition.” Flash looked clearly bored with the topic right from the start. Even though Ruka gave him an out to talking about it, it felt wrong to leave such a one-sided impression when the truth was a lot more complex. ”If there was nothing allowed besides public schools, there would be no options, no choice. An independent school can do something like include religious teachings, or extracurriculars that focus on Olympic level training. Language programs that are too esoteric for general education, things like that. Likewise, they could afford to accommodate students with special needs better.”

”And, for what it’s worth, there is an application process. It isn’t as black and white as spending money for a better education. You can be accepted with grants as well, you don’t have to have the money yourself. It’s not really a stance I’m equipped to defend properly though…” Flash always knew he would be going to Hogwarts, so long as he didn’t become a squib himself. He never grew that attached to Durham School, besides living there. ”Grants are… money that people give you because they think you deserve it. They don’t need to be paid back. My family gives out grants as well, to squibs who are rejected by their families, so they can continue their lives instead of...”

Flash didn’t want to say it, but what choice did he have, once he started. Ruka would only ask him to finish it anyways. ”... ending up on the streets.” Flash could curse Ruka’s father for not seeking out the charity that some people in the world were trying to dole out. Perhaps he had tried and failed enough that he had given up, he wasn’t about to hate a dead man when he didn’t know him better, as much as he sort of wanted to. What was the use in trying to help if people stubbornly refused it?

Ruka clearly didn’t want to talk about it, perhaps a mistake to have expounded on such a boring topic, but he switched to mention football again. Flash recalled talking about his mates when he was explaining the purpose of teamwork, though he hadn’t realized that Ruka was actually paying attention back then. He had assumed the worst as usual.

”Yes, I was on the football team at school. They had divisions for different levels. They were…” Flash wanted to say ‘they were my friends’, but with people like Willow to now compare them to, the relations now felt completely shallow. As kids, they all cared more about themselves than they did each other. ”They were the closest thing I had to friends.”

As they started to switch modes to eating breakfast, Ruka had mostly distanced himself besides keeping a hold of Flash’s hand. Eating and drinking otherwise, Flash wondered with growing panic if he actually meant to hold his hand the whole time. That was far too awkward, it was already embarrassing as it was. Even though Flash sought out and craved physical touch, it was different with Ruka. A barrier had been crossed, they had done something taboo. If it had been Willow’s hand, he might have felt gently comforted, if not finding it a bit funny. With Ruka, and with the words that he continued to say, he didn’t know what to think.

Not knowing what to think was mortifying. Ruka was thanking him, as if that made any sense at all. Flash might have thought it was a joke, or teasing, but he couldn’t be sure. Ruka wasn’t… couldn’t be flirting with him. He probably didn’t know what effect those kinds of sentiments would have, said out loud. Combined with the kiss, with holding hands. He didn’t know how Ruka saw it, but it probably wasn’t anything like how Flash saw it. He almost wanted to admonish him, but he couldn’t, if it wasn’t intentional. He also didn’t want to discuss… their intimacy, either. It was too fresh, too recent still. Flash didn’t want to cause a scene in the Great Hall.

Instead, he gently removed his hand from Ruka, giving him an apologetic glance as he did so.

”Thank you for telling me about yourself as well… and for… listening.” He mostly looked away. He couldn’t recover from this amount of awkwardness. Not with Ruka.

Ruka plucked out the little frog from the fledgling zoo, showing it in his hand like some prized possession. Flash looked at it with the fondness he couldn’t muster to show Ruka face-to-face.

”Of course.” It wasn’t like the piece of paper belonged to Flash anyway, or that it was hard to make at all.

Flash hadn’t considered doing anything with the origami figures, they were all just fodder for the recycling bin in the end, weren’t they? If one enjoyed origami, they couldn’t possibly think to keep every single piece they ever made. Their house would become quickly littered with endless, useless pieces of trash. Perhaps a few of them could be given meaning, though. Granted the meaning from on high, by the human brain that deigned to bless it with purpose. Flash picked up the one that had most impressed him when he saw it finished-- the fox-- and nuzzled it to his cheek.

”I’ll take this one.”

@Ruka Tân

@Flash Holmwood

"Yeah," Ruka said quietly as he contemplated Flash's words, leaning his elbows on the table as he steadied his chin on the palms of his hands.

It was true, if Jack truly minded him using his first name he wouldn't just let him continue to do so. While he did complain about it sometimes, it had never seemed serious enough to Ruka that it would have urged him to stop.

"That he does," he agreed when Flash pointed out that Jack liked to make people question things. "One of the things I like most about him." His expression softened, a fondness overtaking his features that brightened his eyes and relaxed his posture. The change in his demeanour was almost embarrassing, so he shook it again quickly, only a small blush remaining as he focused his attention on Flash again.

It wasn't difficult to refocus; The matter of death threats took over his thoughts almost immediately, and the ease with which Flash talked about them was downright frightening.

"I don't know," he commented, face pulled into a concerned grimace. "Miles from civilisation sounds like the prime location for mass murder, security be damned." Shaking his head, Ruka decided not to comment on it any further than that lest the topic made him even more concerned and upset than he already was.

"As long as you're safe," he just said with a little frown on his face before turning his attention to their little origami figures for a moment. Something about his words seemed to have flustered Flash a little but Ruka couldn't exactly pinpoint what it was so he didn't mention it, simply nodded with a smile when the other boy assured him that the origami figures he had made were fine.

There was another moment of silence when Ruka suggested for Flash to show him a comic or a mystery novel sometime, but the request was answered with a nod and the Gryffindor decided to count that as a win. It meant Flash wasn't opposed to meeting him again, in a casual setting, talking of casual things, exchanging interests, likes and dislikes, just getting to know each other. It was a step in the right direction and Ruka felt lighter for it.

With the subject turning to school systems, Flash started talking again, ignoring the out Ruka had offered him in favour of trying to explain to him exactly how complicated the politics of private schools were. It still seemed strange and somewhat unfair to Ruka but he hummed in contemplation as he stored the information away. Maybe he could do some more research on the topic in order to form a fully fledged opinion on it.

Using the word "grants", it didn't take long for Flash to explain the term and Ruka found himself incredibly grateful for the other boy's consideration and lack of judgment for the fact that the Gryffindor needed definitions for words that were probably used rather commonly by other people.

A smile was set on his face for that reason, and it wavered only slightly when, for a moment, it seemed like Flash was going to stop himself mid-sentence again. He didn't, however, had seemingly learned that Ruka appreciated an honest thought over any hidden one.

It wasn't like the end of his sentence had really impacted Ruka negatively anyway; While he would have defended his life and upbringing to everyone who dared attack it, he wasn't deluded into thinking that living on the streets was in any way something to aspire to.

"That sounds like a great cause," he said honestly, nodding solemnly. "Your family might be saving lives with that." For a moment he wondered what life would have been like if anybody had offered his dad grants just because they thought he deserved them. Had there been opportunities his dad had simply refused to take? Had he not known of charity like that? Was choosing to die over getting help not the first act of selfish pride damning them to a life of the streets?

Could things have been better, easier?

Ruka shook his head in blatant refusal to dwell on the matter. There was nothing that could have been changed anymore, and Ruka didn't need any more reason to resent his father.

The short conversation about Flash's football team was much preferable, even if it revealed fairly little information, aside from the fact that Flash had practically grown up without any real friends.

Ruka could relate to that at least.

"Are you still in contact with them?" he asked quietly.

Chances were he wasn't. Going away to a magic boarding school had to have put a halt to any fragile relationships Flash may have made before Hogwarts. Still, he didn't want to assume.

"Do you miss them at all?"

Sitting next to each other, with their conversation finally having lost some intensity, Ruka almost found himself kind of surprised when Flash removed his hand from the Gryffindor's grip. Maybe it had been too much contact all at once, but Flash's apologetic look at least made him feel like he hadn't done anything terribly wrong.

"Anytime," he said genuinely, flattening the hand that had been holding Flash's a second ago against the table for a moment.

For some reason the Slytherin didn't seem to be able to meet his eye anymore, like their close proximity made Flash scared to look at him, but there was a fond expression on his face when he agreed to Ruka keeping the little origami frog, and for the moment that was good enough.

Not expecting Flash to pay the rest of the small origami zoo anymore mind, Ruka watched curiously as the Slytherin reached for the paper fox and nuzzled it against his cheek.

The gesture was so pure and child-like, so void of any masks, pride or false pretences, that it made Ruka's face light up with glee, a bright smile stretching his features almost painfully. There was just something adorable, downright cute about the action, and Ruka could feel the fondness filling his expression as he nodded almost eagerly.

"Alright," he said, voice hoarse as if overwhelmed by his own emotions. "It's yours."

Flash had to cringe when Ruka mentioned the mass murder of his family, though who wouldn’t. Mr. Schick did his best with the security of their house, they were wealthy enough to afford precautions, as well as magical enough to have protection and alarm charms around the estate. Still, it was true that if something went horribly wrong that no one would be around to help them. Perhaps Mari had a failsafe for that scenario as well, but Flash couldn’t pretend to know everything. He was paranoid enough about other things to start worrying about one of Valerius’ enemies killing him and everyone else in a murderous rampage. A horrific thought, but also unlikely, for many reasons, though it did remind him of a few mystery novels he had read. Flash tried to bury that thought as deeply as possible.

As the conversation continued, Ruka seemed at least somewhat impressed with his family’s charity work. Flash was glad, he was worried he had given a negative perception of them due to his childish hang-ups, but the truth was that they were a force of good in the world, and deserved the praise they got. During some of the balls he attended in his house, there were often people from all walks of life, and even once an entire congregation of squibs. Some of them had been gushing to Flash about how thankful they were for his family, and he listened to them respectfully. Of course, he had nothing to do with it, he was just a kid.

It seemed somehow Ruka was still curious about his football team, to which there was an easy response.

”No. I see them on social media sometimes, but I don’t really have anything to say to them anymore.” As Flash started talking, he felt a creeping sense of dread overcome him. He had never really given it much thought, there was so much to do at Hogwarts that he practically abandoned any attempt at maintaining his connections in Durham. What use were they to him anymore? ”I… had a lot of fun memories with them. I don’t know if… I miss them or not.”

As the conversation started to wrap up, Flash set his fox down beside him and grabbed some fresh fruit and a knife to cut it into pieces with. Ruka seemed to struggle with ending the conversation on a high note, muttering out a final response, but Flash could focus on the task in front of him instead of letting things get out of hand. Flash could compromise, could let things go. He didn’t have to read deeply into everything Ruka said as if it were the verdict of an angel of judgement. If Ruka honestly wanted to learn how to talk to Flash, he could also learn to handle intentional silence.

Sitting beside one another was already something Flash had to get used to. Awkward, but not painful. Progress.

@Ruka Burnett-Tân