A First Closed

“It’s okay if you don’t remember me. I dyed my hair and changed my nam...” I mutter, trailing off so I don’t say anything I shouldn’t. “Right, it is very busy today, everyone has been getting so much work except me. I don’t know how to get the work, find it, whatever. I honestly have no clue. I’ve been wandering the school aimlessly when I should be eating at mealtimes. I haven’t gotten very far because the caretaker often finds me and chases me off. Ugh.” I grumble, looking up at the ceiling. “So you can probably guess, I have no preference on what happens.”
I remember the assignment that people had been assigned and I jump. “Right, you have work to do. I have to finish my book if I want to get any better at this class. I ask questions later if I need any help.” I say quietly, quickly grabbing a book from my bag and continuing to read. As I turn the page, I reach down and re-tie my shoes again before returning to my book. As I start getting to parts on turning water to rum, I look at the time and sigh. It hadn’t been any longer than twenty minutes since I got here and I already messed up.

"What was your original hair color? What did your name used to be?" I didn't know if I wasn't suppose to ask, but I was curious. Was she an undercover spy or a person in disguise? After listening to my parents' tales of Hogwarts, I knew anything was possible at this school. 

Thankfully, Amber reminded me about the classwork we were doing and I considered going back to my seat. I hate to leave anything half done, but the lifestyle she was enduring worried me. Skipping meals? Walking aimlessly? Where was a prefect when you needed them? "Hey, if you're having trouble adjusting to Hogwarts, I'd be delighted to show you around. I've been to most places and maybe we could create a map for people who are going through the same thing as you?"

With no more words to say, I walk back to my desk. I hoped Amber considered my suggestion. i want to get to know her better and I was sure there was more to her underneath the self conscious layer. I glanced at Ember, who hadn't said anything since she asked where Amber was going. That's when I had a great idea. "Why don't we practice memorizing the Transfiguration alphabet all together?"

Oh no. No, no, no, no, no. The girl had corrected her. Ember absolutely hated it when people did that. Especially if they were thinking they were extremely superior when they were actually in the wrong, what Amber certainly was. Spongify made objects... well, spongy. Soft and nice. But Spongify was certainly not a household charm. Ember was just about to tell her this, probably in a retort that would have become rather rude, when Tina jumped in, explaining the two charms instead. Thanks. Sometimes Ember's temper really got the better of her. 

Amber now covered herself with a winter cloak, wrapping her small body in it like a parcel. Now it was Ember's turn to feel in the wrong, her cheeks turning a flaming red. The girl hadn't been trying to leave the lesson after all. While trying to control her tendency to blush quickly, easily and fiercely, she silently listened to the conversation Tina and Amber were leading. They were talking about rather trivial things - help in getting around in their new school, earlier acquaintances on the train ride - when Amber suddenly uttered something that intrigued the young witch. "It's okay if you don't remember me. I dyed my hair and changed my name..." Ember's eyes opened widely as the girl trailed of - as if she had accidentally said something she shouldn't have. Amber quickly talked on as though to get off this subject, but Ember wouldn't give up that easily. "What do you mean, you dyed your hair? You changed your name?" The Ravenclaw stared at Amber in disbelief, wondering what might had drawn her to doing something like that. "Honestly, who the heck are you? Why did you need to disguise yourself? How did that even work without the Professors noticing that your hair and name were different to those of your actual self?" 
At the same time, Tina enquired a similar question, maybe less... forwarding. Amber didn't answer both of them, keeping on talking about classroom work. Tina seemed to want to leave the subject. She offered Amber help with it, then walked back to her seat. Her eyes were shining as she looked at Ember. "Hey! Why don't we practise the Transfiguration alphabet together?" Ember shrugged, then smiled. "Of course! I'd like to!" 

“Ummmmm....” I mutter, trailing off. My stomach growls and I shrug. “Who I am and who I was and still am is none of your concern.” I mumble, staring at my feet. “And studying? Um, I’ll think about it.” I mutter, tucking a piece of white hair under all the chocolate brown hair I have. I take a mirror from my bag and check my eye contacts, looking around to make sure no one is watching.
I go back to work, noticing the worried look on Tina’s face before turning away and reading my book. I think about how Ember questioned me and I freak out. “They know something is off...” I whisper to myself, not knowing what to do. I take down notes on the subject and pull out multiple books, stacking them on top of each other while my mind wanders.
When my stomach growls again, I sigh and go to the bathroom to wash my face with cold water as I’m beginning to feel sick. I go back to the transfiguration room and sit down. My vision gets a little fuzzy but I continue working. Finally, I had had enough and I put my books away, laying my head on the desk and drifting off to sleep as beads of sweat appear on my face.

As much as I was curious, I had values as well. I decided to respect Amber and leave her be. Even though  I noticed the strange clues she left, I did my best to pretend not to notice. I didn't want to be a nosy person in her business. I wish she would join Ember and I in studying, but I figured she would come when she was ready or felt more comfortable. When she fell asleep on her desk, I looked at Ember, unsure of what to say or do. I didn't want her to get in trouble, but I also felt it was important that she got so rest. 

"Should we wake her up or cover for her?" I whisper loud enough for Ember to hear, but not enough to disrupt anyone else. I couldn't focus on the Transfiguration Alphabet since I was too worried about Amber's well being. Everything seemed to leave my brain and I couldn't remember what I learned. I didn't understand why I was so worried about a person I had just met, but I couldn't ignore the feeling that there was more to her, something that I should worry about. I looked at Ember, waiting for her answer.

I wake myself up so I don't get in trouble. My head is throbbing as I lift my head from my desk. I quickly finish writing the notes I was writing and finish the assignment. I wipe sweat from my head and turn in the work. I go back to the restroom, wash my face again with cold water and go back to class; feeling nauseous in the meantime. As I sit back down at my desk, I begin to braid the white streak in my hair absentmindedly but secretly, concealing it behind other strands of hair.
After I finish that, I toss my textbook in my bookbag and buckle it shut. I fall back asleep on the desk, feeling horrible. I had met some great people tiday and that's all I could ever ask for. As I drift to sleep, I kinda have an out of body experience. I float out of my body, free from the weight of my gravity bonded body. As I explore the astral world, I begin to freak out slightly.I begin to have some kind of panic attack and I have to return to my body. I wake up and my head feels like someone is splitting my head open. I clutch my head in agony.

Ember pursed her lips, trying to think of an answer to Tina's question. "I think we should leave her be", the young student whispered, slightly leaning over to the redhead's desk. "She does look really tired. I think she needs it... Anyways, the Transfiguration professor hasn't overheard us talking either, so she'll probably just think Amber has her head propped on her arms and is listening or something like that." She gave a small smile, then turned to look at Amber, who was tossing and turning in her sleep, the movements getting more frantical by the minute. "Um, but that doesn't look too pleasant. Maybe we should wake her up..." Ember murmured tensely, unsure how to act, but all questions became irreverent as Amber made the decision for them and woke up herself. The girl looked even more ill than she had before drifting off to sleep. Her hands flew to her head and clutched it tightly as a little moan escaped her mouth. "Are you OK?", she asked tentatively. "Does it hurt? What's wrong? Should we bring you to the hospital wing? I'm sure the nurse will do a good job... Have you had things like this before?" Then, Ember fell silent, realizing that these probably were too many questions, especially as the one she was talking to seemed to have a terrible headache. 

All this concern for Amber was getting to Tina. First, she wouldn't tell them who she really was despite making it very obvious that she wasn't hiding anything. Next, She wasn't really learning anything and she didn't want the girl to fail. Finally, she was getting tired herself. Sh was tired of studying Transfiguration since she always tried her best but never got the grades she wanted. She felt as though Amber wasn't helping her get better in this class and needed some help. Taking one last worried glance, she waved goodbye to the to girls before moving to a different table to study. she wasn't trying to be mean but rather realistic. She was confident Ember would do whatever was necessary to help Amber.

As she stared at her Textbook, she thought of how the symbols related to the word itself. She knew that finding a common ground would make it easier for her to remember the Transfiguration alphabet. She couldn't wait to start actual transfigurations, but knew she had to be patient. She couldn't let her excitement cloud the reality of the situation. She was never going to do well in Transfiguration, but she would always try her best.