4 Jan 2024, 23:01
The friendship play
November 18, 2023
During the day.
With @Finn Adkinson,
@Nyx Flamesong and
@Dennis Tumberton.
During the day.
With @Finn Adkinson,
@Nyx Flamesong and
@Dennis Tumberton.
Angela had written a new play which she had just finished during the All Saints' vacation. Today, the red and gold girl went to the library to read it over again and see if there was anything she could improve. The first-year knows her piece by heart, having read it over and over again. The play Miss Patel wrote under the name Ari Stophane is called The Secret1. It took her a long time to write it, and a long time to reread it. The problem, if you can call it that, is that no matter how many times you reread it, ten, fifteen, fifty, one hundred, two hundred, there are always mistakes that keep creeping in unnoticed. Today, Angela rereads her play for the hundredth time, if not more, and she still sees mistakes that she hastily corrects. She's had to reread her text more than ten times since this morning and she still sees mistakes. If you look at her parchment, it's full of erasures. At the moment, she's starting to rewrite her piece on clean parchment on which there are no erasures (for the moment at least). When the first-year rewrites her piece, she notices new mistakes that she hadn't seen before. It was then, lifting her head as her neck began to ache, that she noticed three Serdaigles.
"Hi. May I ask what your names are? I'm Angela Patel, first year, but I'm also known by the stage name Ari Stophane, which is spelled like this."
The red and gold showed them the spelling of her stage name found on the cover of her play.
"Do you want to read my play or do you want to know how I came up with my stage name? If you want both, that's possible too. For the reading of my play, I warn you, there's a bit of erasure, but I'm in the process of rewriting it. I'm not done yet, because I've just started, but I'll get there."
344 wolds more 11 words of footnotes for a total of 355 words.
What do you think of this start? Does the date suit you? As I'm a foreigner, I'd like to know what you think of my English.
________________
1: If you'd like to read my piece, click or press here.
#660099
Gloria Shah on PFR.
Gloria Shah on PFR.
5 Jan 2024, 12:23
The friendship play
Dennis headed to the library for more times than he can remember at this point. Even thought it was only mid-November the trek from his dorm to the library was done on auto-pilot. He normally did his written assignments in the library. For being a school about magic, he felt there was more reading and writing than actual magic being done. He supposed that was part of being a first year and left it at that. He wore a simple green t-shirt and his school robes. That was plenty warm enough for the northern Scot.
When he got to the library, he found what could have been an empty part of the massive room save the young Gryffindor who was pouring over a manuscript. It was as good a table as any though as he sat down opposite of her. He snagged whatever free space there was as the girl had her papers scattered trying to keep them in order and correct mistakes.
A few others from his house seem to be looking for a table as well and she seemed to greet everyone and no one in particular at once. Already asking names before a proper greeting, the Ravenclaw wasn’t surprised, this seemed to be typical Gryffindor behavior. When she was done talking about her play, Dennis returned the greeting, “‘Ello. The name’s Dennis. First year Ravenclaw. That's a lot of parchment you got there!"
When he got to the library, he found what could have been an empty part of the massive room save the young Gryffindor who was pouring over a manuscript. It was as good a table as any though as he sat down opposite of her. He snagged whatever free space there was as the girl had her papers scattered trying to keep them in order and correct mistakes.
A few others from his house seem to be looking for a table as well and she seemed to greet everyone and no one in particular at once. Already asking names before a proper greeting, the Ravenclaw wasn’t surprised, this seemed to be typical Gryffindor behavior. When she was done talking about her play, Dennis returned the greeting, “‘Ello. The name’s Dennis. First year Ravenclaw. That's a lot of parchment you got there!"
Last edited by Dennis Tumberton on 10 Jan 2024, 04:07, edited 2 times in total.
Adult: Makaio Kāne | iNPC: Maria Leung de Almeida
6 Jan 2024, 23:25
The friendship play
Finn loves reading, so it's not a surprise he would wind up strolling towards the library one day. As he entered, his gaze met the warm glow of the reading lamps and the rows of books, practically overflowing the shelves.
He's dressed in a hand-me-down sweater and carrying an old sketchbook while looking through the aisles. His fingers traced the spines of journals and novels, seeking comfort in the familiar feel he knew from back home.
In between the shelves, Finn found a secluded corner, where he carefully flipped through the pages of a story that intrigued him - something about different universes, soulmates and that. Only when he heard the soft sound of a conversation did he close the book and mustered the courage to join them. "You got this, Finn, you want to make new friends, so go and do this.", he thought before turning the corner, hopeful to forge a connection with other students.
"Hi there, um, mind if I join you guys?", he offers them a hesitant smile. "I'm Finn - First Year Ravenclaw." He delicately inspected the table the two were already sitting at, examining the, now clean, pages. "Wow, a play? That seems impressive." He then turns to Dennis adding: "And, uh, you're in my house, right?"
He fidgeted with his hands as his eyes scanned the rest of the room, seeing yet another Ravenclaw student wandering around
He's dressed in a hand-me-down sweater and carrying an old sketchbook while looking through the aisles. His fingers traced the spines of journals and novels, seeking comfort in the familiar feel he knew from back home.
In between the shelves, Finn found a secluded corner, where he carefully flipped through the pages of a story that intrigued him - something about different universes, soulmates and that. Only when he heard the soft sound of a conversation did he close the book and mustered the courage to join them. "You got this, Finn, you want to make new friends, so go and do this.", he thought before turning the corner, hopeful to forge a connection with other students.
"Hi there, um, mind if I join you guys?", he offers them a hesitant smile. "I'm Finn - First Year Ravenclaw." He delicately inspected the table the two were already sitting at, examining the, now clean, pages. "Wow, a play? That seems impressive." He then turns to Dennis adding: "And, uh, you're in my house, right?"
He fidgeted with his hands as his eyes scanned the rest of the room, seeing yet another Ravenclaw student wandering around