Russian & Seaweed Biscuits Closed

To Slava (@Ruby Cazares )
3rd September 2020
Written on a crumb-coated parchment with some strands of grass in the envelope

My devilish & demonlike boyfriend,

How is Durmstrang serving you? Are the gargoyles sufficiently menacing? Do you think you could steal me an ancient sword? On second thoughts, no - I almost just dropped a letter opener on my foot.

It missed, don't worry! My feet are as beautiful as always.

Apart from that, all is well for a wild Margo at Hogwarts. The ginger jam I accidentally ate for breakfast this morning reminded me of you and at the moment I'm still panting from saving a poor mouse's life (Hades can get a bit vicious sometimes, as you know). Unfortunately, I haven't actually had time to plot any pranks yet. Although, I'll have you know my friend Ruby looked so peaceful whilst she was sleeping this morning that I couldn't help but stir up some ideas. Any thoughts? Unfortunately, she's just joined the duelling club and I'm a liiiiittle bit worried that she might hex me in her sleep. Not that I couldn't take it, of course. You've seen the power in this slightly smaller than average body.

Of course, I considered joining myself. But sadly I missed the signups searching for dragons (I'm ashamed to report there were none to be found). So now I've decided to hone my skills in another area - theatre. You're looking at the handwriting of the next big actress on Wide-way, Broad-path... that strange muggle street where they do shows. And yes, this slanted scrawl isn't perfect, but did you know it's surprisingly similar to my grandfathers? His guitar misses you, by the way.

My dad, the scoundrel, decided that he simply had to grace you with some of his baking. So there are some interestingly flavoured biscuits in this package. The seaweed ones are surprisingly good, actually. just don't ask where he managed to find some seaweed Is Margo eating your food, you ask? Nooooo. Definitely not. Moving on - Mam also says hi. I think she was in a particularly good mood when she said that considering the giant whopping kiss she smacked on my forehead when I got on the train the other day. The best thing is she didn't realise I was swearing when I cursed in Russian after spilling my tea. I'd say grasp of the language is getting a lot better! Even more than my French which is, uh, quite good. If I ever go to France, nobody will think my name means snail! Let me show you:

Ya lyublyu vas.

Now imagine it with a Scottish accent and some blond pigtails. There's an owl on my shoulder pecking at them whilst I write this. Give him a pat on the head for me - he's a sweetheart. And definitely not trained for hours to poop on your shoulder.

Made you look!

Or am I telling the truth...

Anyway, Hades misses you. He doesn't find it that easy to talk about his emotions. But he feels more strongly than a lot of people I know. Also, she sees you in the little things she does every day. You make her smile. Oh, did I say she? I meant he...

I hope you like the grass I put in. It was stuck in my hair and the owl so kindly plucked it out. I've named him Nibbles Preobrazhensky.

ouy ssim I.

LOL (lot's of love, although 'laugh out loud' would also be a good acronym for us, don't you think?)
~ Your Silly Scottish Troublemaker,
Margo