don't fall away from me Malaika

C

This will be a correspondence long overdue. I hope this letter finds you well, after my last got lost among drafts in my drawers somewhere. It feels like my life has been turned on its head recently. After mulling it all over. Correction: after falling into a spiral of somewhat obsession, you know how it is, recent events are urging me to write you this letter. I don’t know how much longer I can keep it to myself without losing a bit of my sanity in the process.

As I find myself glancing out the café window at the buzzing city life of Manaus, Brazil is embarking on another winter. Meanwhile, summer is just around your corner in England. Yet, I think the heat is still more suffocating here. With June just a few days away, I think of you, as I always do. I can’t believe it’s already been three years. Brazil misses you. I miss you. Although life, as always, continues on regardless, sometimes in unexpected directions. My latest endeavour was resigning from law to pursue education. No, not as a professor, but as the headmaster of my old wizarding school, Castelobruxo. I’ve been enjoying it; further developing this institution has become somewhat of a passion project, even if it wasn’t included in my “10-year plan”.

Neither was becoming a father.

I know what you’re thinking, Mal. I know that I always said that I never foresaw parenthood in my life. I still didn’t, until life came and took me by surprise. My daughter, yes, is attending Castelobruxo and dropped this news on my desk within the first month in office. She’s already twelve years old, apparently something I left behind me during a trip to Chile a decade ago and haven’t heard from since. Her name is Logan, and she is as beautiful, passionate and headstrong as you could have imagined. Unfortunately, that’s as far as my knowledge goes. I can’t tell you more about her at this time.

Hence, I decided to take the weekend off to clear my head and write to you. My parents and sisters have no idea. To be honest, I don’t know what to tell them. My daughter doesn’t seem to want anything to do with me, and while I understand that I’m nothing but a stranger to her, it wounds me. Not knowing at all would have saved me the heartbreak of knowing and having no power to fix our relationship. At the same time, now that I know she exists, I can’t just sit by aimlessly. I’m still trying to decide on my next course of action, because I’m currently at a loss for what to do.

Despite my disarray of thoughts and emotions, I’m always keen on hearing about your life. Have you decided on a date for the wedding? Wish my regards for your fiancée for me. Looking forward to seeing you.

Your friend from a distance,