Zephyr’s Journal
Journal Entry #1 
Reducio Word Count: 257 |
Reducio OOC Notes: This happened in an actual RP and with approval from my RP partner to use it as reference here. |
Today I went to the lake again for some peace and quiet after my tasks were done and I had nothing else to do. There were still days the castle feels overwhelming for me, that I needed some time to quiet my thoughts so my head can settle. I met a girl there, she invited me to join her near the water and we talked for a while. The wind started getting colder and I noticed she’s shaking and hugging herself although she didn’t say anything about it, it was just obvious to me so I took off my jacket and offered it to her. She hesitated at first but accepted it in the end and said her thanks. Even though it’s much colder without my jacket, I was glad I’m able to help someone. While we were sitting there, she started talking about her family and I learned a few things from her, what and who she is, and that things changed a lot for her at home. I didn’t really know what the right thing to say aside from telling her that sometimes people change, but that doesn’t always mean things would be ruined for her forever. Majority of the time I mostly listened and asked questions just to make her talk. I believe that talking about it with other people will help eased the burden a little. My mom used to say that mercy can be small things too, and today, for me, it was staying there and talking with her for a while.
Last edited by Zephyr Deakin on 9 Mar 2026, 08:17, edited 1 time in total.
Calming Presence | The Muggle Condition
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Zephyr’s Journal
Journal Entry #2
Reducio Word Count: 266 |
Reducio OOC Notes: This happened in an actual RP and with approval from my RP partner to use it as reference here. |
It was one of those days I will consider as the strangest days I’ve ever had since coming to Hogwarts. After Herbology I was covered in soil from our class activity, so I went looking for one of the old bathrooms to wash up. When I opened the door, I saw the strangest thing ever, there were beans everywhere, and they’re all jumping around! Not only that, there was a girl lying on the floor in the middle of that mess. She said her cousin sent her a jar of beans and she thought they were normal ones until she opened the jar. That was when all hell breaks loose. If I’ll be honest, I was not sure if I should laugh or help but she clearly needed help, so I offered and started catching them one by one which was proven hard when they keep jumping and bouncing like that. I missed several and while we were chasing them around, we talked a bit and I got to know her! She seemed fun with a chaotic cousin who loves sending her the weirdest package. Eventually, I suggested stopping the beans’ movement first so it’s easier to catch them and lucky for us, the girl knew of a freezing spell which she used and it worked on the beans! They all froze in place and from there, picking them up had been quick. It may be a weird encounter, but still, I helped stop a bean invasion in an abandoned toilet. Not exactly how I expected my day to go but hey, it was a success!
Last edited by Zephyr Deakin on 9 Mar 2026, 08:17, edited 2 times in total.
Calming Presence | The Muggle Condition
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Zephyr’s Journal
Journal Entry #3
Reducio Word Count: 276 |
Reducio OOC Notes: This happened in an actual RP and with approval from my RP partner to use it as reference here. |
Today I tried to do something kind (clumsy kindness is what I would call it), but I’m still not completely sure if I did it the right way. I was on my way to the Valentine’s tea party by the lake to join the activity of decorating cookies. On the way there I saw the same girl from the jumping beans incident. She was standing by a window and looking very upset. I asked if she was okay but she just pushed me away. Normally, I would respect that, but something in her expression made me stop and reassess. You know when someone was showing anger and yet the look on their face, especially their eyes, was screaming for help, they just didn’t know or realized it yet. That was what I saw in her face today. Leaving her alone in that hallway, isolated, didn’t feel right to me so I did something a [little] questionable. I picked her up and carried her over my shoulder. She shouted many words at me while we walked through the corridor. I’m not sure if I should feel amused or apologize. When we reached the tea party, I gave her a cookie and encouraged her to try, maybe she will find it distracting enough. My idea was simple, sometimes doing something small can help someone big time. My cookie ended up looking like a melted tomato by the way. But the girl stayed at the table and decorated cookies, instead of standing alone in the hallway. Maybe mercy isn’t always perfect. Sometimes it’s just trying not to leave someone alone when they need someone to be there for them.
Calming Presence | The Muggle Condition
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Zephyr’s Journal
Journal Entry #4
Reducio Word Count: 349 |
Reducio OOC Notes: This happened in actual RP, I've informed my partner to use our thread as reference here. |
I was reminded today why it’s important to be someone people can rely on. A close friend of mine slipped on the snowy ground this morning, and even though she's in pain, she still tried to act as if it's nothing. It was obvious to me that she was hurting. Seeing her sitting there, embarrassed and trying to hide it showed how good of a person she is, she was in pain herself but she thinks about others before herself. I told her she didn’t have to pretend, that friends are supposed to help each other, and I was not going to leave her alone. She's one of my first few friends in school and knowing she's trying to hide her pain from me bothered me a lot. I offered to carry her on my back to the castle and as expected, she worried for my safety than her own. To get her to agree with my plans, I promised I would stop if I'm tired although internally, there was really no need for that. Her health was my priority. I just wanted to get her safely back to the castle and to the hospital wing. While walking I can feel how nervous she was, or maybe it was her anxiousness of being a burden to other people. She should know by now, I don't mind. I will do anything to protect my friends and try to be there for them if they need my help. After a while, she fell asleep on my back so I continued walking in silence. It showed how much she trusts me if she can fall asleep easily despite enduring her pain. As soon as we reached the castle, I brought her to the hospital wing to be treated. That ordeal drained me because seeing her fall, looking pale and enduring her pain stayed in my mind, it's something you can't just forget easily. I'm glad she's resting now and recuperating. I'll pay her a visit tomorrow. Sometimes being kind is not about words, but being there when someone needs you the most.
Calming Presence | The Muggle Condition
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Zephyr’s Journal
Journal Entry #5
Reducio Word Count: 269 |
Reducio OOC Notes: This happened in actual RP, I've informed my partner to use our thread as reference here. |
Here I thought I don't have anything to write today but just a few minutes ago, I met a girl in the Astronomy tower. I went there to draw for a while as I try to relax although it was proven difficult with the raging storm outside. I was not expecting someone else to be there but there was a girl sitting a few yards away. I failed to notice her presence initially as I was too absorbed with my sketch of the towers and the lightning, and also because of the noise coming from the thunder. She was writing something and I am not sure what exactly happened but her hand was bleeding and there were shard of broken glass beside her. Out of kindness, I didn’t think twice and offered her my handkerchief to clean it and wrap it up since I don't know any spell that could help fix her wound. I was merely trying to stop the bleeding. She accepted it gratefully. I told her to be careful and that she should clean it properly later to avoid infecting the wound. After that, she asked me if I had a spare ink bottle because hers broke which I was happy to help and gave my spare to her. We talked about what we're both working on and what usually inspired us to write (for her) and to draw (for me). Simple things such as offering time, care, or help when someone needs it count for something. Today I saw that in action and I feel good to be able to help others in small ways.
Calming Presence | The Muggle Condition
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Zephyr’s Journal
Journal Entry #6 - Self Reflection
Lately, I have been thinking a lot about my own actions and the way I deal with people. Writing this down is my way of giving importance to the parts of myself that need improvement. It is easy to notice the mistakes in others, but harder to admit them in myself. First, how I always try too hard to help others. In general, I like being dependable because I like people to trust me. In my opinion, it’s not a bad thing, but sometimes I take the matter too far. I always put others ahead of myself. I have this mentality that I’m a tool for humanity, and it's my job to somehow aid anyone in need in whatever way I can. I cannot say I feel inferior or superior to others, but I do think there are some things they understand I cannot grasp. I don’t seem to want things, or have much preference so might as well help those who have. When someone is struggling, I feel a sense of responsibility to fix it, even though they're not really asking for help. And when I cannot provide it for any reason, I feel like a failure to them. Though I have nothing to do with the situation, I have the tendency to blame myself. There were times when I agreed to do too many things because I did not want to disappoint anyone. Sometimes I feel tired, but I would still say yes, thinking that if I work harder or try my hardest, people would find it in their hearts to appreciate me more. When that doesn't happen, there was this bitterness inside that I couldn't ignore but not toward others, but toward myself. I feel I am not doing enough, even though I've given my all. I know in my heart that this is a mistake, that I cannot carry everyone’s problems and control other people’s emotions. Trying to do so would only leave me stressed and exhausted. It also creates unnecessary expectations that aren't realistic even by my standards. Please self, learn to accept that helping others shouldn't always sacrifice your own well-being. Forgive yourself for believing you have to be perfect just for others to acknowledge your existence and importance. You don't have to worry about what others are doing with their life. Forget the expectations of others and see what you trully want and desire.
Second, how I often stay silent about my own feelings. Because I focus so much on supporting others, I rarely speak up especially when I feel overwhelmed. One thing I dislike the most is showing weakness, so I usually keep things inside. I thought that by staying quiet, it was the better option. I didn’t want to complain or seem ungrateful. However, that silence sometimes turns into frustration. There were moments when I felt unnoticed or unappreciated, but instead of talking about it, I mostly kept it to myself. That alone created distance between me and the others. It was not their fault that I don’t communicate what I think and what I feel most of the times. It was mine and mine alone, I chose silence instead of honesty. I realize now that this was also a mistake. Good relationships require good and open communication. If I feel overwhelmed, I should say so. If I need help, I should ask. There is nothing wrong with that. Keeping quiet does not make me stronger, it only makes things harder for me. Please self, take responsibility for these patterns, you cannot blame others for how you feel when you’re not the one who did not express yourself clearly. Please recognize that your pride and ego sometimes stops you from speaking openly. Real strength is not hiding yourself, it is being honest in the most uncomfortable situations. Please also remember that sharing your emotions is what makes you human. When you do not share emotions, and you keep what you truly feel for yourself inside, you will become an enigma for the others, because they cannot read you or feel your humanity.
Forgiving myself does not mean ignoring these mistakes. It only means learning from them and deciding to do better. I want to stop measuring my worth by how much I can do for others and to remember that I am allowed to take a break, I am allowed to say no. I am allowed to share my own feelings and I am choosing to clear the slate with myself. I forgive myself for trying too hard and for feeling guilty when I couldn’t solve everything. I forgive myself for keeping my silence when I should have to speak up. My actions were not perfect, I am not perfect, but they helped me learn. Moving forward, I will try to be more balanced. I will still help others, but not at the cost of my health or honesty. I will communicate better and accept that I cannot control everything. Growth means understanding these things and changing step by step no matter how slow, no matter how small. I want to become someone who helps others genuinely, but also respects himself… that is the kind of person I am working to be.
Calming Presence | The Muggle Condition
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Zephyr’s Journal
Journal Entry #7 - Letter to Myself
Dear Zeppy,
Let's have a serious talk, shall we?
I don’t think you have realized yet how much pressure you are putting on yourself. You always try to portray yourself as helpful and reliable, which you really are. Because you like being relied on and depended on, and there is nothing wrong with that. But sometimes, that strength turns into responsibility for things that's not even yours to deal with. You tend to act quickly when you know someone is struggling to fix their problems. Even though sometimes they don't even need or ask for your help, you're compelled to act and when you cannot solve it yourself, you will feel like an utter failure. Those kind of situations are never yours to fix, and that habit slowly drains the life out of you.
You don't want to disappoint anyone so you also have the tendency to say yes as often as you can because you have the fear of being seen as unreliable. You expect yourself to manage everything and when reality slaps you in the face and fails you, you feel bad about it. It leaves no room for rest or even mistakes, please don't forget you're also just human, incapable of fixing everything. You need to confront your own silence. When you feel overwhelmed, you don't want to speak about it. You think that being silent is better than complaining for fear of being viewed as ungrateful. Remember, by keeping your silence, others will not be able to support you if they do not know your needs. They also cannot adjust if you never tell them you are struggling. Silence will not always protect you, it will also isolate you.
Let's be honest that pride plays a role in this. You prefer handling things on your own because it feels powerful. You think twice before asking for help, but let me tell you that strength is not measured by how much you can endure. Real strength involves honesty too and by that, I mean admitting when you are tired, when you are confused, or in dire need of support. Moving forward, let's promise that we'll do these things together. First, let's set some boundaries and think before we agree to any responsibilities. If you are already overwhelmed, we'll say no without feeling guilty. Bear in mind that you can be supportive without limit. Second, and this is important, we'll learn to communicate openly. If something is bothering you, you will share it to the people you trust, you have friends, trust them more, rather than store it away. If you feel exhausted mentally and emotionally, you will express it rather than act as if everything is fine with you. You will not assume people automatically understand our needs, clear communication is the best way to make your relationships with other people stronger.
These changes will not happen the way you expect, don't fret okay? Just try again. There will also be instances that you may go back into old habits and that's to be expected. Again, it's okay, try and try again. Don't give up. What's more important is awareness and effort. Growth is not supposed to be instant, it is gradual and consistent. You do not need to prove your value by overworking yourself and earn appreciation through exhaustion. Go rest, speak and continue being the kind person that you are, but include yourself in that kindness. Continue being a dependable person, but not at the cost of important things in your life. Your actions should come from choice, not from obligation. Let your voice be part of your relationships and with that, you need to learn how to share the weight too.
Keep improving step by step. I'm proud of you.
Yours Truly
Calming Presence | The Muggle Condition
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5
Sta: 7 | Eva: 8 | Str: 7 | Wis: 5 | Arc: 8 | Accu: 5