Is it really about that bet? PV - Zephyr Deakin - Ended

Zephyr spent most of his afternoon reading by the lake and after some time, he returned to the castle walking slowly while reading. He borrowed a book from the library, just a simple guide on magical plants. It kept his mind busy for the past two days now. He didn’t want to think too much about schoolwork or the cold weather. It was freezing today, colder than usual.

He turned another page while walking, “Should have brought gloves.” He cannot help but mutter to himself. Finally, after a few more lines, he closed the book with a soft thud and stretched his neck, not realising it’s stiff already. He lifted his head to see where he was and stopped.

Far down the corridor, he saw a familiar figure….Rose.

At first, he just smiled instinctively, he had not seen her all day. He opened his mouth to call her name but before he even got a word out, she stopped, turned around and walked the opposite way.

His smile disappeared instantly. “…What?” Suddenly feeling confused. She didn’t look hurt or upset, isn’t she? She didn’t look like she’s in a hurry. She just turned around as if she didn’t want him to see her and that was strange? Really strange.

He frowned, his eyebrows pulled together in confusion. Why is she avoiding me? Is something wrong? Did I say something weird the last time we talked? Is she angry? Or… His stated overthinking until he shook his head and tried to clear his head. “No. Something’s off with her.” already picking up his pace.

He didn’t want to shout her name at first, maybe he was overthinking and that she didn’t see him. Maybe she just forgot something but when she turned into a side corridor looking like she’s hiding…that was when he confirmed it.

He stopped pretending nothing was happening and jogged forward, and dodged through a couple of younger students. “Rose!” He called her name louder. His voice echoed down the hallway.

Jogging faster, he tried again. “Rose! Hey! Wait!” He reached the corner she turned into and slowed down, his breath rising in the cold air, and heart beating faster than normal. He didn’t know what was going on, but one thing was clear, she was avoiding him, and he wanted to know why because he cared.

As soon as she saw him from afar Rose went the other way hoping Zephyr wouldn't have seen her at all. She was small and few students may have indeed hid her or not make it clear that was her to him.
While she was walking she didn't dare to turn around to see if he were actually following her instead she quickened her pace. To be honest that was annoying her.

Why am I behaving this way? How stupid she thought as her heart beat faster not only because of her pace.

She turned to a side corridor thinking that would quickly hide her from Zephyr's sight if he were actually behind her. However lucky as she was the corridor was almost empty only with few students on the side sat on benches or just standing up talking. Not enough to make her go unseen.

"Great..." she muttered to herself.

Rose sighed again as she kept walking not sure that was actually the right way to the library but she couldn't think straight now.

She was starting to feel a bit more nervous when she heard someone screaming her name. It was Zephyr's voice. As she expected -and didn't want to- he did have spotted her early.

She didn't stop nor turn around when he called her again followed by a loud enough wait. He didn't appear to Rose he was walking as she could hear more like running food steps. If so he would reach her in any minute and she would have to face him. Her cheeks warmed up of shyness and embarrassment at the thought.

What would I tell him? That I hadn't seen him? I'm doing that bet? she wondered worried.

"Never ever he will believe me..." she whispered.

As she was hearing the foot steps coming closer she looked around before seeing a short sideways recess leading to another small corridor -or a classroom- Rose wasn't sure what it was actually but she didn't think twice and slid into it to hide hoping Zephyr would pass by without noticing her. She tried to calm down and to slow down her breathing not to be overheard.

When Rose heard Zephyr's footsteps closer than ever she almost stopped breathing. It sounded like he had slowed down as his pace didn't appear to be as fast as before and he almost seemed to be out of breath.

Rose felt ridiculously stupid hiding where she was but only the thought of him being in the same corridor not to far was enough to make her shy facing him. She hoped for this moment to end quickly as Zephyr would keep going further for her to get out and go back to her initial path to the library.

Probably unlikely.

Zephyr’s heart was pounding as he ran through the corridor, dodging students and trying not to crash into anyone. His mind was a whirlwind of questions. Why is she avoiding me? Did I do something wrong? He was nervous for some reason, the same feeling he usually got before a big test, or before he had to talk to someone he hurt, be it directly or indirectly. He slowed down when he realised he was getting closer and could hear his own footsteps. Somewhere down a smaller corridor, the echo of hers or at least, the sound of someone moving quickly away from him.

“Rose! Wait!” he called her name again, but this time his voice was almost unsure. Why does she keep running away? Didn't she hear my call? He took deep breaths to try to calm himself. He was not accustomed to confronting people, especially someone he considered a friend. Back in Swansea, he had always been the quiet one, the kid who would just sit on the bench in a playground watching others play. Talking to strangers was hard. Talking to someone he already considered a friend was even harder. He was utterly confused right now.

He didn't even notice where he was going; he was too focused on catching up to Rose. When he turned another corner, expecting to see her up ahead, she was gone. He skidded to a stop and bent forward, putting both hands on his knees to catch his breath. The cold air burned in his lungs, and his hair fell to his forehead with sweat. “Where did she go?” he muttered to himself as he scanned the empty corridor. He was trying to figure out which way she could have turned.

He just stood there, thinking and trying to calm his rapid heartbeat and regain his bearings. He could still hear distant footsteps and the murmur of other students in the hallway, but Rose was gone? He straightened after a minute or so and wiped his sleeve across his mouth. She can’t just disappear. Where could she have gone? Sighing, he tried to think logically. Think, she must have gone into a side corridor… or maybe a classroom… somewhere nearby. I can find her. I just need to... He looked around, jade eyes scanning every shadow, every doorway, but there was no sign of her. A sinking feeling grew in his chest. He just wanted to make sure she was okay.

Rose still hidden in the sideways recess could hear her own heart beat. She heard footsteps coming to an halt as she was hearing someone breathing hard. Rose knew that was Zephyr as she saw him passing by where she was hidden without him seeing her. Thankfully.

She carefully looked out of her hidden place to see him bending down hands on knees catching his breath. She felt a bit bad and sorry for behaving this way but it was easier for her although painful as she appreciated him and considered him like a good friend.

When he suddenly straightened himself she stopped looking not to be seen. She looked down at her feet thinking she actually might tell him what was on her mind. He would probably understand and help her figuring out. However she was also scared to ruin their budding friendship.

Why did I have to be confused like this? she thought almost blaming herself.

Because Zephyr was the first boy to really interest himself to her and made her comfortable enough for her to open up and to tease him this easily her heart had to get confused and mixed feelings. Plus she knew -at least she supposed- Zephyr was not confused like she was. They were only friends for him. Rose was also considering him as a friend but there was something else.

She breathed in and out as she sorted out two choices offering to her.

The first one: she was confessing him how she has been feeling and what was on her mind risking maybe their friendship....or
The second one: she was playing dumb and behaving like it was nothing but goofing around keeping everything to her. Although Zephyr might not appreciate it and not even believe her.

Whatever she would decide she didn't like the outcomes much.

Or I could just go back to the way to the library she thought knowing Zephyr would spot her right away and she would have to chose between her two choices anyways.

At some point she would have to face him either way so why keeping it. She sighed as her light green eyes looked in the corridor again spotting him.

Rose took all of her courage and got out eyes looking down her cheeks slightly blushing. She felt nervous with racing heart as she was fidgeting her hands not knowing what to say.

"Hum..." she quietly let out to catch his attention although he already might have heard her walking.

"I'm sorry...Zephyr." she added looking down a bit on the side.

This is confusing.

Zephyr didn't know how to react or how he should feel about the knowledge that Rose was avoiding her. He stayed there in the middle of the corridor, brows furrowing deeply, trying to understand what had just happened. Rose was nowhere to be seen. Every possibility ran through his head, spiralling around until he didn’t know which one to believe. He started pacing while pondering. She’s not hurt, is she? She didn’t look upset last time, so why would she suddenly avoid me? He was frustrated and helpless.

Without noticing, he kicked at the floor lightly with the toe of his shoe, wishing he had some sort of clue. Why can’t she just tell me? The thought of her being somewhere close but not answering his call was unnerving. He sighed; he had no idea what to do next. Should he wait? Should he keep looking? Or should he just give up and hope she would come find him? But he knew he couldn’t just leave it like this. I need to know. I just hope she’s okay. He was in that predicament when he heard her voice on his side.

He turned slowly toward the source of her voice and saw her stepping out, eyes down, with red cheeks. Why is she looking like that? Did something happen? This is complicated than a Quidditch match. He couldn’t stop the worry lacing into his voice. Why is she saying sorry? For what? Did I imagine her avoiding me? Or is it something I did? I didn’t mean to upset her, did I? He was unsure what to do or what to say in this situation.

Sighing once again, he grabbed her hand and started walking toward the courtyard (godmodding permitted by the writer). He didn't want her to feel bad, but he wasn't getting many things right now. Why would she run away? What did I do? “Come with me, let’s talk, but not here, okay?” He led her toward the courtyard, his mind still reeling. What if I did something super dumb? I don’t even know. Why is this so confusing?

Once they reached a concrete bench, he sat down, still holding her hand with him. "Sit with me?" He exhaled loudly, trying not to blow out the stress in his chest. “I'm confused.” He admitted in his earnest voice. "Do you... hate me? Why were you avoiding me? Did I do something wrong? Did I say something weird?” Question after question came out, causing him to overthink her actions.

He looked at her, eyes wide and full of worry. She’s become his friend, and he likes to keep it that way, but why does it feel weird now? He waited for her answer anxiously.

Rose was standing there in the middle of the corridor not knowing what to do or what to say more. She was looking down at her feet hoping for Zephyr to say something. The silence seemed to be endless as she just wanted to dig herself in the stone ground.

Why is he staying silent? she worried not daring to look up as she felt too shy and embarrassed to actually look at him.

She was starting to get really nervous when she heard a sigh and the second after she was being pulled out toward the courtyard.

Zephyr had taken her hand in his. Although the feeling was agreeable that was the last things she needed right now. His hand was warm like last time and it appeared to be softer or was it because she already knew the roughness feeling of his hand? Nonetheless her cheeks warmed up and her heart started to beat faster again.

Zephyr wanted to talk somewhere else and Rose was starting to feel a bit anxious about the upcoming discussion and her brain was getting foggy yet she was glad he initiated it.

Once they reached the courtyard and headed towards a bench Zephyr sat down still holding her hand as he asked her to sit as well. Rose was looking at their hands holding each other as she felt her cheeks blushing. Sadly that was something difficult to conceal, especially considering her fair skin. Rose finally sat down next to him feeling a bit awkward and apprehensive.

She was still looking down as Zephyr started to speak saying he was confused. She couldn't blame him. Her too would have been confused if it were the other way around. Rose was going to say something when Zephyr's next question made her looking up at him her eyes widened.

He thinks I hate him?

Following the next questions Rose was sorry he felt this bad about it and that he even questioned his behaviour as if he did something wrong. She looked down again at their hands.

"I'm far from hating you..." she muttered.

"I didn't mind to worry you or make you think you have done something bad or wrong when it's actually the opposite." she said letting out a small chuckle not because if was funny but thinking at how nice and simple it was when they spent time together which made her feeling like she was now.

She sighed as her light green eyes finally looked up at him.

"I'm confused about you... I know we are friends but..." she paused trying not to panic and to let her nervousness slipping out.

"To be honest I don't know how to feel about you, what I feel about you..." she quietly said while looking down again her cheeks blushing a little more as she felt shy confessing how she has been feeling.

"... so avoiding you was easier for me than facing you." she ended up admitting.

She was a bit ashamed and just waited for him to say something as her nervousness has risen again and her heart was pounding in her chest.

Zephyr was trying hard to process her words. She was saying she doesn’t hate me... then… why was she avoiding me? His green eyes looked at her in confusion as soon as he heard her words. “Wait, so you weren’t mad at me?” His voice was almost unsure, but there was sincerity in it too.

He wanted to believe her, but part of him still hesitated. "Then why did you run? Why hide?" He was trying to make sense of what was happening. “I just don’t get it, you’re saying you’re confused about me? About your feelings? I don’t know what to say.” His brow furrowed as he rubbed his nape, something he always does when he feels awkward or uncertain.

He squeezed her hand softly, almost instinctively. “I like spending time with you a lot. And I like that we’re friends. I don’t want to mess that up. But now I see why you’ve been acting weird around me.” Since when did that change? Was he that naive and ignorant that he failed to notice some changes in her? Is this a positive or negative change? He was not sure yet. Her hand felt cold but soft against his touch. Subconsciously, he started rubbing it with his own gently as if offering some comfort.

He paused for a beat while trying to put into words exactly what he was feeling, something he wasn’t used to doing. “I don’t know exactly what you feel, but whatever it is, it’s okay. You don’t have to hide it from me." His eleven-year-old brain was working double time to understand her feelings. Back home, he mostly knew how to take care of things, help people, and do what needed to be done. He doesn't really know how to handle this yet.

Jade eyes caught hers and searched for a hint of what she wanted him to do. “Is avoiding me like this the one way to solve your issue?” Although he didn't understand what was the main issue, he hated the idea it's the only solution to it. "Is there anything I can do or... or, say?"

Rose was nervous at what Zephyr was going to answer her. Of course he wouldn't cut her off but his behaviour towards her could change.

Nevertheless he asked her again as if he wanted to make sure that she wasn't mad at him. She slightly smiled at him as she shook her head side to side.

"No I was not mad at you."
"Why would I have been mad at you when you have done nothing wrong and were so nice to me?" she asked trying not to let her cheeks slightly blush.

She wanted to make sure Zephyr understood she was still considering him as her friend and that he had done nothing wrong. The problem was coming from her not him. He didn't have to question himself or overthink as Rose was scared he might do it too much. Of course she knew it was her behaviour who made him think this way but she didn't intend to.

Zephyr asked her many questions about the way she behaved earlier which was understandable. She was not hating him yet avoiding him. Kind of contradictory indeed.

Rose felt a bit more nervous as she had to explain in a more detailed way her thoughts and feelings which she was not sure about nor very comfortable talking about it. Plus Zephyr's frown was not really reassuring her. Nevertheless he was still holding her hand in a gentle way as he started rubbing it. Rose focused on it. The warmth of his hand was comforting and calming her.
Her own hand might feel really cold to him but Rose could feel it was warmed by Zephyrs.

She calmly breathed before talking while looking down at their hands.

"Whenever I was thinking of you or the idea of talking to you and even just passing by you I couldn't help but feel so nervous and shy. My heart was starting to race and my mind was going blurry. I was losing my composure." she admitted. Then she slightly titled her head while carefully looking at his hand as if she were thinking of something else or searching something on his hand.
"Not knowing what to do I got scared of my own feelings overthinking what I would say, how I would behave if I were to see you." she looked up again at him the worry in her light green eyes had given way to relief.

Rose was glad Zephyr slightly understood her probably not fully as she even didn't know really well what she was feeling as it was the first time for her to feel such a thing. At least Zephyr was not judging her yet supporting her in a way which was warming Rose's heart.

"I too don't want what we have to mess up. That's also why I wanted to avoid you I guess. Waiting for it to fade away at some point. That was really selfish." she looked away ashamed and embarrassed.
"I'm sorry for hurting you." she said looking back at him her eyes full of sincerity.

Rose was not sure what Zephyr could actually do. The issue was not coming from him but her so there was probably nothing he could do. However she felt a bit ashamed not to have trust he would not judge her.

"Thank you Zephyr. she paused looking at him before laying her eyes on their hands again "I shouldn't have hide it but...well...I panicked I guess." she slightly smiled "Dumbie" she whispered.
"Now we have talked and I opened up there is no question of avoiding you anymore." she smiled at him "As for what you can do or say...well as long as you don't say you hate me or don't want me around you anymore you're fine." she said mischievously her eyes slightly sparkling teasing him again.

That could be surprising but she was feeling relieved and content to have been able to explain to Zephyr what has been going on up there in her head. She decided to just let it be as Zephyr would still remain by her side which she was glad enough.

Whether what she was starting to feel would grow or fade away only the time would be telling her.

While Rose was explaining herself, Zephyr was a mix of relief and confusion. Relief that she wasn’t mad at him, that it was not something he did wrong. “Okay...” Saying it almost to himself than to her. “So, it wasn’t me, but rather, it was you being nervous around me?” He basically repeated what she said, as if by doing so, he would understand what was going on with her.

She explained that her heart was racing and her mind was going blurry, and looking at her this close, he noticed she looked flustered too. “That’s why you ran?” His own fingers fidgeting slightly not used to talking about feelings seriously. Curiosity and care all over his expression. “Sometimes, I feel nervous too. Like I don’t know what to say, or I mess up, or I don’t know if I should do something.”

It may have been confusing to him, but now he thought he understood what was happening a little better. She was not avoiding him because she didn’t like me. She just didn't know what to do. He was speechless, so he didn’t say anything else for a while, and just kept holding her hand gently. He could tell this was a big moment for her, and even though he didn’t fully get all the feelings, he knew he wanted to be there for her.

She believed that by avoiding him, the feeling would go away. “Rose, you didn’t have to go that far. You will only hurt me if you do.” When she said sorry, he shook his head quickly. “No! You didn’t hurt me, really. I… I’m just glad you told me.” His fingers brushed hers awkwardly; he didn’t quite know what to do, but didn’t want to let go either.

"I don’t hate you, and I still want you around, to continue being my friend.” Although this talk was making him awkward, he really glad they did because he was worried. Now that everything's cleared up, there was a small smile on his lips. “We're not going to avoid each other again, okay?” He was glad that they could talk about this, and that she trusted him. He knew he wanted to stay close to her, just like before. Raising his pinky finger, "Promise?" It may be shallow, but his 11-year-old self will honour this promise.