Nothing(Everything) is Wrong PV Charlotte Evergreen Fall Ball

@Clarke Olverin | Words: 407 | Location: Fall ball, The Lost Pearl

Charlotte wasn't exactly planning on going to the ball. She hadn't been to any other balls last year. She just wasn't very interested. But for some reason, she was making her way down to the lake. She didn't know exactly why she decided to. Maybe it was the way the other kids chatted excitedly about all week, or when the other girls in Ravenclaw got ready for the ball together in the common room. It was like something just. . . changed.

She'd found herself in her room, looking for something nice to wear to the ball. She had on a light blue dress that she found in her closet, that she'd bought but never worn, and she tied her hair in a messy bun. The dress was simple, but good enough, and at least her bun was staying. Charlotte didn't bother with makeup, or jewelry that might take too long.

Not bad, she'd thought when she finally looked into her mirror. After all, she'd just decided to go pretty last minute. As she made her way down to the ball, her heart beat with excitement and hope. People were flowing in through the entrance of the Lost Pearl, and that was when Charlotte realized that she didn't even know what to do at a ball. Since she decided to go on the spur of the moment, she didn't really plan for it. There were lots of other people of course, but she didn't recognize any of them. She stood a bit anxiously, just looking around. For the first time that night, Charlotte felt a bit out of place.

She scanned the area, watching people chat. She noticed this one girl in particular. She had on a beautiful dress, and looked great, but that wasn't what caught her attention. She seemed to be a bit distracted, and. . . a bit upset? Maybe she doesn't know what to do as well, Charlotte thought. Maybe she felt a bit lost too. Well, maybe they could both use a friend, or someone to talk to at least.

She walked towards the girl, who seemed to have sighed. She seemed vaguely familiar. It was possible Charlotte had seen her around school somewhere. What was her name again? Wasn't it Claire or Clara or something like that? No wait. . . it was Clarke! Fingers crossed behind her back, Charlotte smiled and said "You're Clarke right? I'm Charlotte."

"You're Clarke right? I'm Charlotte," the girl said as she approached.

"Yes, I am Clarke. Are you from Ravenclaw? I think I've seen you on the Ravenclaw table before," Clarke replied. She had started mentally calculating every one of this girl's moves. Just for any sign that might reveal why she was talking to Clarke.

Clarke liked the girl's bun. Messy and casual. But in a fancy type of casual. Clarke couldn't help but admire her. Simple, but beautiful. She reminded herself that admiring someone wasn't going to help defend herself against them hurting her. That would only make it worse, not learning from before and falling into the same trap again.

But she didn't want to have to do that. She wanted to trust people. She wanted to think the best of others.

But she couldn't. And that was that.

"Did you need something? I was going to go back up to the castle," Clarke spoke again, more closed off now. She hadn't been planning to go back to the castle, she just didn't want to talk to anyone. Better to just stand in a crowd, hearing others speak, rather than her talking herself. That way she was invisible, both to the crowd and to herself.

@Clarke Olverin | Words: 310 | Location: Fall ball, The Lost Pearl

Charlotte smiled, happy that she got her name right."Yes, I'm in Ravenclaw!" Charlotte said, glad that Clarke recognized her a bit. For some reason, Charlotte was always surprised when someone recognized her. She always felt so. . . invisible. "You're in Griffindor, right?''

Her bun was becoming loose, so she took out the hair tie and did it again, hoping it wouldn't get loose again. Her buns always got loose. It was sorta annoying, how many times she had to re do it. It probably wasn't as perfect as it was in the beginning, but whatever.

"Have you been to any other balls? I haven't. This is my first time,'' She said, trying to start a conversation.

Charlotte looked around her, at the other people around her, just taking it all in. The water was so pretty and the weather was nice. She was glad she came to the ball, and she relaxed. There was something about Clarke, still. Something Charlotte wouldn't shake off. She seemed so. . . unsettled. Like something was bothering her. She thought that maybe Clarke would relax too. Since, well, they could talk to each other. Stop being paranoid. You're probably just imagining it.

When Clarke told her she was going to leave, Charlotte's heart dropped. What was the point of putting on nice clothes if you were just going to leave? Plus, it was still early. . . Why would you want to leave so soon?

"You're gonna leave? Already?" Charlotte said, trying to hide her disappointment. Before she could stop herself, she said, "Why?"

Charlotte knew that was a bit rude. A bit nosy. But she really was curious why Clarke wanted to leave so soon. She hoped she didn't do anything wrong. Maybe it was her. Clarke seemed nice, despite her uneasiness.

Feeling a bit bad, she told Clarke, "Did you just want to hang out here?"

"You're gonna leave? Already? Why?"

"There's nothing down here for me. Why do you care," Clarke snapped. Clarke wanted this girl, whoever she was, to leave. "You're just like everyone else—busying themselves in other people's business. Leave me alone." At this, Clarke got up and stalked off. The first few months had been really hard. Then Clarke thought she was getting to a place where she could forget. But Charlotte came and made Clarke feel awful again. She couldn't explain how she felt, other than 'awful'.

All the memories she tried so hard to bury, came back again. Clarke held back tears as she stared across the water. She heard Charlotte coming towards her. She smoothed her dress and straightened her shoulders.

"You don't know me. You don't know what's happened. You don't want to know. If you did, you'd want to unknow it. I want to unknow it." Clarke moved across the floor, towards the other side of the dining platform. And Clarke knew Charlotte followed her. She was scared. Scared that Charlotte would leave her alone. Like a lost cause. Because no one could fix her. No one could help her.

She didn't want to be left alone. Not again. Tripp left, her sister left, her dad left. Not physically, but she knew they felt disappointment in her.

She turned to look at Charlotte. Her braid felt itchy against her bare back. She wished to be back in her dorm, in an oversized sweater, snuggling up with her notebooks and getting lost in a different world.

@Clarke Olverin | Words: 314 | Location: Fall ball, The Lost Pearl

She flinched at Clarke's words. She didn't mean to offend her. Charlotte's cheeks turned a shade of red as Clarke stormed off, leaving her alone next to the water. She felt bad for saying those words. No, worse than bad. Horrible. Despite Clarke's coldness to her, Charlotte followed her. She thought about letting Clarke leave and move on. Clarke was probably angry at her.

She knew Clarke would want her to go away. To leave her alone. But she couldn't. She had to apologize, to make things right at least. So she hurried to Clarke, her bun becoming loose again. This time she didn't bother redoing it. She pulled the hair tie out of her hair. She followed Clarke, her footsteps quiet and slow, even though she knew Clarke knew she was behind her. Clarke stopped walking.

Charlotte could see her eyes. They were a bit watery, and Charlotte felt terrible for making her feel upset. What happened? Charlotte knew not to ask this time, but she knew she had to apologize. Before Charlotte could say anything, Clarke started to say something.

"You don't know me. You don't know what's happened. You don't want to know. If you did, you'd want to unknow it. I want to unknow it."

Charlotte didn't say anything. She didn't know what to say at first. She didn't think Clarke would tell her anything, besides telling her to go away. Finally, she said, "Clarke, I'm so, so sorry." Charlotte paused. "You don't have to tell me what happened, and I don't need to know. Whatever happened, I'm really sorry that happened to you. You don't deserve that."

She didn't know what else to say. She wondered if Clarke wanted her to leave. "Clarke, if you want me to leave, I'll leave. I'm sorry for being nosy before," Charlotte sighed. "I guess I just wasn't thinking when I said that."

Clarke didn't want Charlotte to leave. She needed someone to stay.

"Don’t go," Clarke replied, barely audible. She stood still, waiting for Charlotte to go. Why should she stay? She didn't even know Clarke. It wasn’t fair. So many happy faces. And hers was not among them. She wished to go back to the way things were before. She had looked forward to her seven years at Hogwarts, but then it all happened and she couldn’t even think about having fun at school anymore.

Clarke’s writing had gotten nowhere because every time she picked up her quill, it felt too heavy. Heavy with memories that she shouldn’t have had. Writing had been her solace from the world, but now she couldn’t even do that.

She wished Charlotte could know this without Clarke having to tell her. She longed for a comfort, but too often found none. Partly because she couldn’t bring herself to open up.

She spoke again, “I’m going to go to bed now. I’m tired. Maybe we can talk another time?” Clarke hoped Charlotte would say yes, but didn’t know when the next time would be since homework was becoming a lot and there was little time for anything else.

@Clarke Olverin | Words: 314 | Location: Fall ball, The Lost Pearl

Charlotte stood in silence as she waited for Clarke's response. What a night this turned out to be. She sighed, and really wished she hadn't said anything to Clarke. She felt really bad. It wasn't Clarke's fault. Charlotte was probably being too nosy. Charlotte just felt tired. She didn't think going to the ball would mean arguing with someone.

Her hair was in tangles, and she was pretty sure her bun was ruined from everything that happened, so she pulled it out and let her hair fall down. She sighed one more time, and said, "I'm really sorry Clarke." She wasn't sure if she had ruined Clarke's night, and well, at least saying sorry was something.

Finally after what seemed like an eternity of waiting, Clarke quietly said, "Don't go."

And those two words were enough, to make Charlotte feel like everything was going to be alright. Like maybe they could be friends. Well, maybe not friends, but something. But Charlotte didn't know what to say. Finally she said "I won't." And she stood there in silence, not sure what to say next. When Clarke said she would leave, this time she didn't ask, or ponder. Charlotte took a breath, and said "Alright, well goodnight. I'll see you around Clarke." She watched her walk away, and turned her attention back to the ball.