Bad Advice

Tie the cat to a chair and keep hugging it for all eternity. It will soon adapt to the hug situation and love you. (Maybe.)

I keep getting up way too early on weekends and I can't go back to sleep.

I am not, as chosen in my profile, female, but agender. I use the pronouns they/them. Thanks.
Bad Advice
@Quinn Prescott
In Soviet Russia, you don't go to sleep. Sleep goes to you. I recommend moving to Soviet Russia.

I need to go to the DMV to renew my driver's license, but I just don't wanna. What should I do?

Stam:10 - Eva: 5 - Str: 15 - Wis:5 - ArcP:1 - Acc:10 - Ability: Broken Broomshaft, Evasive Maneuvers
"Just keep swinging"
Bad Advice
@Jorah Moussa With a laminating machine and some ingenuity, you can skip the lines and avoid the fines!

I want a sandwich, and I want something new. What should I put in there?

"Touch me, Midas; make me part of your design."
Encyclopedia Entry (and further history.)
Strength: 1; Agility: 12; Control: 10; Stamina: 7
Bad Advice
@Rainier Green
Have you tried people? Its...to die for.

I'm wanted by the police for making questionable sandwiches. What should I do?

Stam:10 - Eva: 5 - Str: 15 - Wis:5 - ArcP:1 - Acc:10 - Ability: Broken Broomshaft, Evasive Maneuvers
"Just keep swinging"
Bad Advice
Answer all the questions about them. Then they won't be questionable.


My house is Haunted.

-Jefferey Hiller
Bad Advice
Purge the demons with fire! Burn down your house.

I'm homeless, what should I do?

Stam:10 - Eva: 5 - Str: 15 - Wis:5 - ArcP:1 - Acc:10 - Ability: Broken Broomshaft, Evasive Maneuvers
"Just keep swinging"
Bad Advice
Enter a home with no car in the driveway! The lights are out, you're free to sleep on the couch, and fridges typically have food in them. Beware of allergies.

I seemed to have a customer who is upset because their drink isn't what they thought it would taste like. However, they do this daily, and I know them to be a problem. What should I do to stop this from happening again?

"And so he was reading the story as if it were a spell and the words of it, spoken aloud, could make magic happen.”

« Stamina: 4 | Evasion: 5 | Strength: 4 | Wisdom: 9 | Arcane Power: 6 | Accuracy: 7 »
Bad Advice
Don't ever deliver the drink. If you never give them the drink they can't get upset on how it tastes.

I thirty minutes left to do a two page essay I haven't started yet!

"Quotes are for dumb people who can't think of something intelligent to say on their own. Like me."
Bo Burnham
Bad Advice
Type the essay out in 24 size font. You'll have two pages in no time!

Unfortunately, I seemed to have misplaced my glasses somewhere. Retracing my steps, I can't seem to find them. What should I do?

"And so he was reading the story as if it were a spell and the words of it, spoken aloud, could make magic happen.”

« Stamina: 4 | Evasion: 5 | Strength: 4 | Wisdom: 9 | Arcane Power: 6 | Accuracy: 7 »
Bad Advice
Check where you stepped. You probably broke them and they’re currently on the bottom of your shoe. Nice going by the way.

What is the best way to bake cookies for Kris Kringle?

Jesters do oft prove prophets. 𓀚
I am the brother account to Romeo Marchonné & Zyva Hel Fae Skógrwight