Bad Advice

Don't use anything in your hair! Then you'll have a valid excuse for why your head looks like it has a nest on it.

The groups of people that I'm around mostly have different views of me, and it's hard when I have to hide details about my "other life" from my parents. How do I make it so I don't have to do this?

Leave it unlocked at all times, thus you won’t need a password, and then no need for secrets


I need to get back to work, but I’d rather waste time here, what do I do?

Accidentally pull out all the pages you haven't read. That way, there will be no avoiding the fact that you've read all the contents of the book.

I have a dreadfully small amount of brain capacity. Assist me.

get rid of the brain. that should bring some more capacity into that small skull.

I'm feeling tired all the time, what should I do?

Tell them you already know everything about the subject so you won't be paying much attention. Teachers love a student that knows their stuff.

What should I add to my exercise regime?

500 donut reps, and twenty five remote control curls.

My wand has a crack in it how should I fix it?

All drop out of school and start a band against the establishment

Someone flooded the cafeteria, what should we do?

Break both of your legs so you have to use a wheelchair.

My cat won't get off of me, what should I do?

Have a friend hold the pillow over your face.

I don't know what I should have to eat?

You can always check the sewage system to see if there's anything you like there.

The elves keep catching me stealing knives from the Great Hall.